Living Light

Stirring The Deep

Category Archives: Healing


by 29 Comments

Conquering Our Soul, Undoing the Bondage

Conquering Our Soul:

Undoing the Bondage

 

Our soul is like a territory held in bondage by an enemy. When we are awakened to the state of our soul, then we realize our need for someone mightier (Jesus Christ) than ourselves and our enemy to deliver us from the entrapment. When we accept that Jesus is the One to deliver us, then He comes and claims the beachfront of our lives. So we are His, however, aspects of our soul are still untouched territory. As we abide in His Word and are willing and listening, bit by bit Jesus makes advances taking over the territory of our soul as King. Under His Kingship, we live free and as we were created to live. I want to explore some ways He makes those advances.

For years I experienced pain in my body in reoccurring areas. It wasn’t unbearable, but at my young age, it was far more than I should be experiencing. I knew something was way off. I tried many external remedies but nothing worked, but each “cure” presented a new hope. A friend told me about what a Cranial Sacral Therapist had done for her, so I found someone in my area. During the session, as she was working on my neck and head, she asked me if I had experienced any trauma in that area as a child. At first I thought no, but then as I laid there several experiences came to mind, but they weren’t of a physical nature but an emotional one. That thought process led me to see a deep trauma in my beliefs – that I lacked a sense of value for myself. Until that point, I never fully realized this debilitating belief. I went home knowing I had stumbled upon something significant. I realized I needed to stop looking outward for solutions and look inward.

As I brought this issue into my quiet time with God, He started unraveling it bit by bit. It ended up being a core issue that underscored many other issues (almost all of them, including my pain). I started to see the massive ripple affect of that ill-belief spreading to every area of my life. Eagerly, I prayed and listened to God’s instruction, and He started laying it all out. He showed me how most of my thoughts, actions, and decisions were tied to a lack of value for myself. He showed me where this idea started and was reinforced in childhood. As He took me back to painful memories, ones I feared to face or simply didn’t want to out of pride, I travelled with Him trusting His guidance and He covered them with His love, truth and forgiveness. As pain appeared in other areas in my body, I listened and He led me to other issues all related to my core one. He opened up each area of anger, pain, and fear, and brought in His truth. When He was done, I held an unchanging priceless value in myself as His child. However, many of my habitual ways of responding and acting were still reflective of that girl who had no value. Through awareness, abiding in His Word and prayer, those actions started to fade and were replaced by ones based on who I truly am as His unique creation and this transition is in progress today.

I share this story, because 1) it demonstrates a type of progression in how the territory of our soul is conquered by God, and 2) many people have this core issue of a lack of value (from childhood rejection, abuse, neglect, modeling of parents, and so on). Some know it and many deny it, but I see it in many people. When we lack value we spend our lives trying to prove and earn our worthiness and most of what we do is a result of this lack of value, therefore, we aren’t able to be completely surrendered to God’s will. We are more driven to prove or earn our worthiness. God calls us to be surrendered completely to Him and that surrender is a journey. For many facing core issues is a significant part of that journey. But we have to stop the madness of trying to prove and earn and abide in God’s presence and seek His deliverance. God wants us out of that bondage and will allow or do what it takes in our lives to bring us to this understanding, to healing and freedom.

The Progression of Conquering Our Soul

First, an uncomfortable situation arises in our life to get us seeking, like a physical aliment (as I had), intense trial, or difficult relationship. We live in blindness to our own soul and something has to wake us up. When all is fine, we don’t seek. But when things aren’t, it’s to push us to search from the depth of our soul. Often what starts us seeking is something that gets our full attention, and it is different for different people. How better to get our attention than with something we really care about?

Second, from seeking we get a word of truth about the state of our soul that comes to us through a dream, person, the Spirit, or God’s Word. When that word or insight resonates strongly with us, like the issue of value did for me, this is our first awareness of seeing Christ on the edge of this section of our soul ready to take it over and deliver us.

Third, through spiritual weaponry (like faith, prayer, meditating on His Word, the Bible, and /or fasting) the anchor of that stronghold is uprooted. For me the stronghold was the lie I had no value, God uprooted that ill-belief and replaced it with the truth that I have infinite unchanging value. One point on fasting, it is a tool that when God calls us to use it (He decision not ours), it can be extremely powerful. It’s an act of faith that we are completely reliant on His Word for life. Matthew 17:19-21

Fourth, once the anchor is uprooted then there is a time (usually much longer) of restructuring and rebuilding, like when a land is taken over by a new regime it has to be established on their rules. As the rebuilding occurs in this certain area, many issues may spring up that are related to that area like anger, modeling (what we learned from our parents), and unforgiveness. Each one of these has to be addressed and replaced with truth and love. This work of rebuilding is God’s. Our part is to seek His deliverance, listen to and obey His instruction, abide in His Word that cuts through our soul healing and restoring, pray, and hold onto His truth as it’s established in us.

After believing lies for so long it sometimes takes awhile for the truth to truly be ours. Because of the strong connections in our brain established from acting certain ways for so long, it sometimes takes awhile for us to act according to the deliverance that is happening in our soul. But once the anchor is uprooted, then we should see progress forward however slow. Building a new way of behaving requires great patience, trust and perseverance. It requires that we trust God who begun a good work in us will complete it (Philippians 1:6). As this area is rebuilt, God moves onto the next one to conquer. If we are diligent to heed His instruction, follow and trust in Him to do what He promises to do, we will experience true freedom in our soul. The good news is that once our core issue is addressed it resolves many other issues that came from it. Though, it may be a longer process initially, it is delivering us from many problems in our lives.

If you are struggling right now, perhaps it is the Spirit trying to get your attention. Ask and seek why you are going through what you are. Be aware of insights you have about your situation. Pray about them don’t ignore or push them to the side. Dive into them. They may be God on the forefront ready to move and waiting for you to call Him in. Deliverance requires your involvement. Let His pure Word penetrate your heart, pray, meditate on His truth daily and follow His direction and He will take over and rebuild you into the new creation you are in Him.

In my experience this process can be painful at times as our depths are unraveled and exposed and it isn’t instant by any means. It is a journey, sometimes taking years, but He is faithful to finish what He began. What are a couple of years compared to a lifetime of freedom? Most of us give up. Stop trusting. Stop seeking deliverance. Stop listening. Stop abiding in His Word. Don’t give up. Believe God is good and desires you to be free. And remember it is God who starts, directs, and completes this journey. It is by the Spirit’s lead not our own initiative.

Matthew 7:11 If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!

Bookmark and Share


by 8 Comments

Purging Pride

Purging Pride

 

Once again I’m laying out my brokeness before you. I hope that in showing you what I have learned it will encourage you to seek the truth of your actions and reactions that we may see ourselves as we are and grow in the grace and love of God. So here we go as the blinders come off . . .

This past week it has come to my attention – thanks to the Spirit – that when I get deeply hurt by someone pride becomes my best friend. She comforts me telling me how wrong they were, justifies my frustration, builds walls for protection from further hurt, gives counsel on how I should respond (all very justifiable), produces a copy-cat forgiveness, reassures me the issue is about them – not me, and keeps the situation focused on me ~ of course.

As I reflected back, I realized pride has been a faithful friend for years, but I didn’t see her true colors until this past week in this area of my life. I was surprised because she was so faithful that I never recognized her when she came around. I suppose I thought she was someone else.

The Spirit brought to mind a couple of different situations where she was controlling and needed to be taken out:

In one, pride reinforced her walls so that even though the pain was from the past, it was affecting the present. I held back and kept a safe distance emotionally for protection – when I didn’t need protection. But pride kept the memories fresh and the walls standing.

In the other, pride was giving all kinds of self-focused advice about how to respond to a friend’s judgments, condemnation and jealousy. And with pride’s thoughts filling my mind, my attitude and responses toward my friend lacked true love.

As the Spirit pulled off the deceptive veil of pride, this is what I learned.

As an example, here’s the second situation. My pride was trying to get me to abandon the friendship or at least have minimal contact with her because of how she was acting toward me. But the Spirit gave me different counsel – to stay in her life and love her. This is what He said . . . I need to not provoke my friend with areas where there is jealousy (He showed me what I did and how it affected her, because I didn’t realize what my actions and words were creating). I need to be sensitive to her struggles. I need to encourage and lift her up because she is so beaten down by others. I need to put my expectations about how I think the relationship should be aside. She needs the love of God to flow into her life, and the Spirit wants to use me to do that. Yes, I need boundaries, but I need to let the walls crumble that prohibited God’s love from flowing into her life through me. Boundaries allow the love to flow, and creates a healthy balance in a relationship. Walls block love. As someone commented on my last blog, if a friend stole money out of your wallet you wouldn’t leave your wallet laying around, but you don’t cut your friend out of your life either. Glup. Pride didn’t like that as I felt her power deflate.

As the Spirit guided me to what I needed to do, He filled me with the love and desire to want to do it. So “need to” became “desire to’. Incredible. Some of the hurt still remains, but the pride is fleeting. I have a feeling as I obey the Spirit’s lead in this situation, He will heal the hurt.

I can’t believe how selfish I was . . . well I guess I can because I’ve seen it before. It’s hard to see your flesh so clearly at times, but it’s the only way to fully turn from its ways to God’s. What never ceases to amaze me is as this raw reality of my actions was exposed, the Spirit gently encouraged me along. The Spirit doesn’t condemn us; He leads us to truth in love.

One of the many problems with pride is that all she creates within my thinking prohibits the flow of love, which is counter to God’s will for us. So the spirit is working on purging my hurt of pride and changing how I view these type of situations.

I’ve learned a very important lesson – when I get deeply hurt by someone, pride steps in posing as my best friend and governs my thoughts and actions. As a result love flees. I’m thankful for this awareness. I’m glad I finally saw pride, who comes in so many disguises, for who she is in this area of my life. I’m thankful for my eyes being opened to the state of my soul because only then can we truly be set free. The Spirit is a tremendous counselor if we will learn to listen and heed His instruction.

Pride and true love can’t co-exist.

1 Corinthians 13:4-6 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth

Bookmark and Share


by 18 Comments

Healing the Wounds Left by a Father

Healing the Wounds Left by a Father

 

Someone made a comment on my post Fear of God – Beginning of Wisdom about how though I was blessed with a wonderful earthly father, many aren’t. I was asked to address those who haven’t been so fortunate. I don’t necessary think I’m most qualified to address such an issue, but I wanted to honor the request and share with you want I have learned from my friends who have had issues with their fathers. I was thankful for the suggestion because many of my friends fall into the latter category. In fact, this past week as I was visiting my family many conversations came up about the impact of fathers. We talked about the effects of no fathers, fathers who neglected, over protected, who loved. Here are my thoughts . . .

Unfortunately, many men have done a poor job as a father. Like the rest of us they are fallen and far from perfect. But the role they have has such an impact in our lives that their actions effect us more than most. Fatherhood is a great responsibility. It’s a job that reveals a man’s greatest weaknesses and to those he is supposed to love the most. As a result of those weaknesses, some have abandoned, neglected, abused, and overly controlled their children. Among my friends those who didn’t have a good experience with their fathers instead had with a relationship of lack that left them with deep wounds, anger, pain, disoriented paths, and vast voids in their lives.

So if the experience with your father left a huge void or vaults of pain in your life, how can you draw near to a God who says He is your father? How do you know really what that truly means? How can you trust God to be your father, when your only experience of a father was none at all or crappy?

Initially how we view God is related to how we viewed our father. We carry over the framework given to us from our father to God. But this obviously isn’t where we are to stay mentally or emotionally – whether our experience was good or bad – we each need to seek God as He is and if we do He will teach us and show us who He is. He is able to give us what we never had in our earthly relationships, if we seek. John 14:21

Talking to one of my friends about her experience with her dad, she said, it’s true he left a big hole in my soul, but it provided a larger place for God to fill. Because of that lack it pushed me closer to God seeking from Him what I didn’t get from my dad. I have been blessed to know and depend on God in this way.

This is the treasure in broken relationships; God comes into the brokenness in such intimate way. Wounded souls gain a special relationship that is nourishing and rich with God because of the lack they had. They deeply connect with Him in a way they otherwise wouldn’t.

Often it’s the void, in whatever area of our lives that drives us to seek God with passion with our hearts, souls and minds. The wound, the pain, and the emptiness are powerful drivers. God uses these driving forces to turn something deeply painful into something amazingly blessed. Our fathers have a big impact in our lives, how much more our heavenly Father if we let Him in into the depths of our pain and sorrow? It’s about perspective. We can either see our past experiences as a never ending wound in our lives or we can see it as an opportunity to experience the presence of God in a very intimate and personal way. Where do you want to be? Which one are you fostering in your life?

Our earthly fathers, whether good or bad, are to point and drive us to our heavenly Father.

A mistake often made is getting caught up in looking to our earthly fathers to repair the damage they left behind. We aren’t to look to them but God. God is our eternal Father; our earthly fathers are but a vapor Psalm 39:5. We need to be careful not to put too much focus on the temporary because then we neglect the eternal. We are to seek God to complete and fill us, to heal and restore us. As for our earthly fathers we have to abandon the hold they have on us, or we will remain living out our lives in a reaction to theirs. We are called to live in the spirit in the newness of life, not the past. With God’s grace we can. Only God can truly enable us to move forward. Though, I haven’t had to do with my father, I have in other areas. Freedom comes from Him, and He is able to set us free from whatever binds our souls. As long as we look to our earthly fathers to play a part in delivering us from the pain we are looking in the wrong place and often will be greatly disappointed.

You can’t wait on them to change, to apologize, to make good for the damage they did. Because many never will due to blindness to their own lack. The truth is we are fallen. We cause others pain. We damage with our actions and our words. We all fall short. God is offering freedom from that bondage of pain caused by others. It is a process no doubt especially with our fathers, but is a journey that in the end will fill you with gratitude for the earthly father you had because of what it brought to you in your relationship with God. It may be hard to believe, but God loves you more than you know. He wants to give you what you never had if you will open yourself up to Him. He wants to go into the reservoir of that pain and abide, and turn it into rivers of love.

Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds.

Romans 8:15 For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.”

If you are God’s, you have a new Father, embrace Him.

Bookmark and Share


by 6 Comments

Mom and Me

Mom and Me

One of a Kind Relationship

In reflection of Mother’s Day yesterday, I want to share with you one of my most cherished relationships, the friendship I have with my mother – a one of a kind.

My Mom and Me

My Mom and Me

Over the years, my mom has become not only one of my most adored friends, but also she understands me more than most. In Social Intelligence, Daniel Goleman talks about how children take on characteristics of their parents – it is fascinating. He explains the neuroscience behind what I have experienced in my relationship with my mom. She and I share not only similar traits but similar “issues”. Her struggles are very similar to mine because as a child I developed in her reflection.

This mirroring is a great blessing because I have someone close to me, whose love abounds toward me, who I can be completely vulnerable with, and who understands!! There is no glazing over of eyes, but a depth that says, yes I know, wrapped in abundant love, not judgment or disapproval. We truly have shared in each others pain, because we both have experienced it in varying degrees. Because of our similarities we are a tremendous support, encouragement and comfort to one another. There is no one who can take her place, because no one understands what I face like she does, and vice versa.

I wish this relationship for everyone because the intimacy is precious and unique. However, I think many don’t because they have resentment toward their mothers (like I once had) or they can’t accept their imperfections; because it is too hard to admit that they may be a bit like their parents. Often the traits we don’t like about others are the traits we don’t like about ourselves – whether we are conscious of it or not. As a result, we keep at a distance from seeking to really know and understand our mothers. When I was younger I convinced myself I was nothing like my mom. I resented certain ways that she was. What a fool I was on many levels. Only when I was open to all that she was did I really begin to learn about her and thus about me and the healing began in our relationship and in us.

I am my mother’s daughter. I am a part of her.

Interestingly, when I accepted that we shared similar issues that is when the healing began. As long as we suppress and deny our inner “stuff” the more it grows and festers. Healing comes with acknowledgement. First you have to acknowledge the problem before it can be fixed. I think God created this mirroring affect with our parents so that we have a built in reflection of ourselves, support, encouragement and someone to help us grow past out issues.

If there are things about your mom you don’t like. Take a closer examination. Perhaps there is some of her issues in you that you need to acknowledge so you can grow past them. And once you realize that it is okay to share in those vulnerabilities, then the healing begins and the journey to freedom can be shared with a woman who understands more than anyone else. And in the process a sweet intimacy is created unlike any other.


by 5 Comments

Lost Art of Reflection

Lost Art of Reflection

 

Journaling = connecting and listening to your inner life.

In this busy world, who has time to sit down and reflect on life? Most people don’t. We obsess about things (now we were treated, worrying about the future, children, marriages, work and so on) as we busily try to get through the day, but that isn’t reflection. That obsessive mind talk is our soul creating mayhem because we haven’t given it time to truly process what is going on.

This world has moved far from God’s truth. With our self-wills running wild without the truth to guide us, we are creating all kinds of evil, madness, and out of control behaviors. And one is a busyness and lifestyle so consuming that we have no time to engage in the art of reflection; an art that brings harmony, centeredness, and truth to our lives. A life of reflection is a vital aspect of spiritual health.

The art of reflection is taking time to journal. Why journal? Because for most of us when we think without the guidance and focus of a pen or a keyboard our minds wander so that we can’t complete the thought we started with. Writing guides and grounds our thoughts. It puts a thought in a form we can grab a hold of and contemplate. Without the pen, we end up with a mind swarming with broken and uncompleted thoughts. Journaling allows a thorough reflection of what’s going on in our spirits and how the outside world, circumstances and people are affecting us and how we are affecting others. It allows us to process what is going on, to reflect and mediate on it. We start to see ourselves, others and situations from a clearer perspective – and when we dwell in the presence of God we see more inline with the truth. For Christians the act of reflection is extremely powerful because it isn’t just us trying to work out what is happening in our inner world, but we have the spirit of truth, the spirit of God, searching our depths and giving us the ability to see the truth.

In his book, “Ordering your Private world”, Gordon MacDonald realized how journaling helped him to come “to grips with an enormous part of his inner person that he had never been fully honest about.” I found this very true in my own life. There have been numerous times when I have sat down to write in my journal that I gained tremendous insights into myself and my situations. I thought an issue was about one thing and it ended up being about something else. Sometimes it amazes me what is truly going on in my soul, and I often wonder where I would be if I hadn’t taken the time to stop and reflect. I would probably still be trapped in my old ways of thinking and acting in a stupor and that means doing things I wish I hadn’t and creating a life I didn’t want. Once aware of the truth then we can act and respond in a way that fosters truth and life and not lies and death.

Journaling within the presence of God brings truth and thus freedom and true life to our lives. It is a time of quiet and focus which allows us to hear not only ourselves but the spirit of God dwelling in us shedding light, wisdom and truth into our souls.

If you don’t journal or haven’t in a long time, now is the time to start.


by 2 Comments

Reframing Our Situations

Reframing Our Situations

 

We look at situations from a certain point of view and we think that is real along with the emotions that follow. But often we are off and need to reframe our perspective.

This past week was the first time for me to leave my kitties at home alone overnight. And not just one night but four! As I was packing up that morning, I picked up Malcolm and tears started to flow. How lonely they would be. They might think we are never coming back. They might think we abandoned them. At that moment, I knew this wouldn’t work. One, I would be a complete crying mess and two, I might not get on that plane. Then I realized how silly my thinking was. Sure they may feel a bit lonely because animals do – but all that other stuff – I don’t think so. I was projecting human thoughts onto them. So I stopped and the spirit of truth reframed. They are going to have a great time, jumping on counters, scratching our dinning room chairs – all those things they aren’t suppose to do. And the loneliness they feel will be minor. At that point the tears stopped and I made it out the door without another drop – barely. Our perspective is powerful in what it creates.

God has been teaching me a lot about reframing. There have been several situations lately (some mentioned below) that when I stopped and sought His input of truth I discovered my initial view point was off and I needed realignment. God is adamant about us seeking truth because the consequences of living in lies are extensive. The wrong outlook can destroy relationships, our purpose, and ourselves. It can destroy our body, mind, soul and spirit. Once you live in the truth, how living a lie affected your life becomes clear. I’ve been amazed at what the lies created in my life – and it was nothing good.

I am finding that this simple act makes a huge impact in our work, response to problems, relationships, ourselves, you name it. And when you reframe your point of view your emotions change and your emotions aren’t erratic or damaging but appropriate and helpful.

The part of this that isn’t simple is seeing the truth. From our birth we are inundated with lies. We develop concepts about us, others and the world that simply aren’t true. Only by abiding in God’s pure truth as the Spirit as our teacher do we start to learn the truth, start to see clearly. And it isn’t instant. Developing an intimacy with God that leads to His truth invading every recess of our lives is a journey. Intimacy requires trust and trusting God is a process. We have to know Him to trust Him and knowing Him as He is and not our images of Him takes time. Our lies about Him are some of the first ones His expels.

Abiding in His Word is the key. When we dive into God’s Word and abide with Him as a bride, in time He reframes our perspectives on Him us, others and this world. As a result, we are more aligned with what is true and real. Because of our limited physical capabilities we can only know in part, but that part is much more accurate, and it is a view that brings life, abundant life.

I have a friend who I only see a couple times a year. I had certain expectations about how I wanted that time to be spent – engaged with one another, one-on-one time talking, catching up, and diving into intimate conversations. I told her that was my desire. But that isn’t where she is at – she is a busybody running to and fro. When plans didn’t go my way, I started to get frustrated and hurt that she didn’t have the same expectations. But when those emotions started to set in and my actions were becoming jaded, I stopped and the Spirit reframed. I accepted that we were at different places, decided to enjoy what we have for what it is, and not try to conform her to what I want in a friend. The hurt and frustration dissipated and I ended up having a good time. My previous emotions would have wrecked havoc on the friendship. The latter ones allowed me to enjoy what have whatever level it is on.

One more example . . . my older brother and I aren’t very close. When I visit my parents, he stops by and we have a thin and brief conversation. I thought we just didn’t connect and he wasn’t interested in a relationship, and left it at that. But this past week was different. I put those thoughts aside and engaged him in a deeper conversation. It was wonderful. We discovered we shared many things in common. We had a stimulating long talk that neither wanted interrupted. God altering my perspective of how I viewed our relationship caused me to respond differently to him and as a result him to me.

Review your relationships and situations that are bothersome to you. Seek God’s wisdom and counsel. Perhaps it is a reframing issue.


by 7 Comments

Guarding the Windows to the Soul

Guarding the Windows to the Soul

 

William Shakespeare said the eyes are the windows to the soul. God says they are the lamp of the body. If the eyes are good, the body is full of light. If they are bad, the body is full of darkness. Luke 11:34

The eyes, representing what we focus on and attend to, can fill us with light (goodness) or darkness (evil). They are the opening of our soul through which things flow. Therefore, we have to be very careful what we focus on and bring into our soul because it affects our entire body, soul and spirit.

The past couple of days I have been thinking about the significance of this truth.

What do I focus on throughout the day? What am I taking into my soul? Is it good, helpful, productive or is it negative, destructive, and misleading? What we allow to come into our souls either leads us to or away from God and His truth. And lately little things have been trying to slip in that shouldn’t be.

It is amazing how the world’s philosophies creep into our lives. Constantly the world is pursuing us to trust in its ways, to focus on its concerns, and to be enraptured by its fears. And it is relentless in its pursuit. It wants to own us and take us captive to do its will. 2 Timothy 2:26 And often it is so subtle we don’t recognize it for what it is – contrary to God’s truth. Here are three subtleties that often try to creep into my life.

Our physical health. Who or what do we look to for healing; drugs, pharmaceuticals, doctors, or natural remedies? God is our healer. The things of this world can remedy pains but without God they are useless. Asa, one of the kings of Judah, looked to the physicians and not to God and died as a result. 2 Chronicles 16:12-13. God created many wonderful remedies and often uses them to heal and restore, but without God working in them, those things are worthless. He is their potency. He is life. The only reason they work is His mercy. When we start to trust in them, we lose focus, the world creeps in and darkness starts to take over.

Our soul’s health. What or who do we trust for our soul’s health; self-help books, programs, seminars, or therapists? There are many truths out there about our inner health and what helps and what hurts, but who are we trusting to do that work in us? We are to trust God. Philippians 2:13 He works in us as Master Creator. When we follow the world’s methods it is like putting band aids over gushing wounds. When we trust God He is a diligent surgeon who heals us through and through. I have walked both paths – there is no comparison between the work we try to do and what God does in us. Yet, sometimes the world’s ways still tempt me.

Our provision. Do we trust in this world’s system to provide? When our paycheck comes from our boss it is easy to start trusting in him, our work, our abilities, or our skills to provide for us. When we think God is too slow in bringing what we want or need we become like the Israelites at the bottom of Mount Sinai. Exodus 32 When Moses was gone too long, they made a golden calf to trust and worship. When we feel God takes too long in providing we justify He needs our help and we start concocting our own schemes to provide. God is in control of our paths, not us, and not another man. God gives us a job to do. We need to do that work following His lead and leave the provision up to Him.

Those of the world only have this world for their help and hope. They have to trust it because it is all they have. But as God’s bride, we are called out of this world and are to trust Him for everything. We are no longer alone in this world or left to its whims. As our Husband, God wants to provide all. We live by a different set of rules. We live by a different power and strength – not ours but His. We have God Almighty on our side working for and in us. Therefore, we don’t have to worry and chase after these things as the world does. We are free from being concerned about them because God has moved in as our provider in every area. He takes care of our lives so we can focus on Him. Matthew 6:24-34

When we focus on God and His truth, we are pouring light into our souls. We are filling our eyes with His goodness and our bodies, souls and spirits thrive. If we flood our eyes with the concerns of this world then we are pouring in darkness and our lives will suffer.

Guard your eyes, the windows to your soul, for they determine if you live a life abundantly in Him or a life of lack trapped in the schemes of this world.


by 8 Comments

The Father Connection

The Father Connection

 

From personal experience and from a multitude of conversations, I see a very strong correlation between the type of relationship we have or had with our earthly father and the type of relationship we have with God . . . initially.

Unfortunately, many of our dads have given us negative ideas of what a father is: selfish, controlling, neglectful, abusive, overbearing, pushover, passive, and tyrannical. These poor images are often obstacles to overcome when we are seeking the truth of the character of God. Our dads’ traits create a framework of what a father means to us. Initially, we place that structure onto God, good or bad.

If your dad abandoned you, you believe God will leave you, if he was difficult to please, you think God is never satisfied, if he was distant, God seems inaccessible, if he gave conditional love, God will withdraw His love, if he was judgmental, God is seen as critical, and if he rejected you, you believe God will. On the other hand, if your dad gave you security, God is secure, if he protected you, God is your shelter, if he gave unreserved love, God gives unconditionally, if he was accepting, God will receive you no matter what, and if he was involved, God is too. Our challenge is to seek who God truly is and not what our particular experience of a dad dictates.

Whether we call him dad, daddy, pop, pops, poppa, father, sir or nothing because he wasn’t there, we all have dads who made a tremendous impact on how we view God. To understand that our natural inclination is to put our dad-filter onto God is the first step in learning the truth about Him. Without this self-reflection, we walk around unknowingly believing misconceptions about God. We will relate to Him not as He is but as our filter dictates. Our beliefs are everything and therefore it is important to abide in the Word to get to know Him as He is. It is essential to our lives, because God is life, to remove our old dusty filters and replace it with the pure, true reality.

John 8:32 “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

Understanding and acknowledging the impact that our dads have on our perception of God helps us to move closer to understanding who He is and therefore gain the relationship we were meant to have with Him. His intimate presence in our lives is His desire for us and to realize that most us have misunderstood who He is as a father is a monumental step to a fulfilling that purpose.

I have an amazing father. I am very blessed because he instilled in me trust, security, mercy, and love, which made it easier for me to believe and accept these traits in my relationship with God. However, it doesn’t require a good dad to be intimate with God. I have friends whose fathers were distant and negligent and God has filled a very special void in their lives creating an incredible bond. We didn’t choose our fathers. God chose them for us regardless of how they were to draw us to Him.

Me and My Dad

Me and My Dad

The intense hunger for an idyllic dad was placed in us by God to be ultimately for Him. Therefore, we are to seek Him to fill this role because He is the only One who can. If we continue to look to our earthly dads to fulfill it or have suppressed the desire out of continued disappointment we will never find what our souls hunger for. God created us with this yearning that we might grope for Him.

Just realizing this connection doesn’t change it but it is an essential step because it puts our hearts in a seeking mode. We have to personally dive into God’s Word and learn who He is. Our heavenly Father far surpasses any concept we have a dad and He wants to reveal this side of Himself to each one of us in a personal way. As always, our part is to seek.

Take a piece of paper divide it into two columns. Write down all the characteristics of your earthly father. On the other side write down all the characteristics you currently believe about God and be honest. Don’t write what you have heard, write what you believe. How does He respond when you do something good? How does He respond when you do something bad? What does He think about you? And so on.

Then start seeking out who God truly is in the Word. Write down the verses where He is telling you who He is as your perfect eternal Father. Try not to filter but come with an open heart to know Him as He is. If we seek, we will find.


by 2 Comments

The Power of Confession

 The Power of Confession

 

A while ago, my mom and I had a heart to heart discussing some of our deepest wounds. It wasn’t meant to be a confession, though that is exactly what it was. We were simply being honest and open about issues we face and how they impacted each other and sometimes still do.

Recently, my husband and I had a similar conversation. Again, it wasn’t meant to be a confession, we were just being transparent about pains and weaknesses and how they affect each other. Like the conversation with my mom, our talk was liberating on many levels. We had confessed our shortcomings to God many times, and told each other sorry for things we had done, but when we exposed the depths of our souls and our own pain that caused pain in each other; it took healing to a new level and brought us closer. Through our words, love abounded and pain receded.

The freedom and restoration I experienced from these two encounters got me thinking about the power of confession. Both conversations encompassed deep wounds and I am discovering the deeper the pain the more restorative the confession. Usually we are scratching the surface when we tell someone we are sorry, but when we pour out our souls to another in love it is truly powerful.

James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

When and why is confession between two people so powerful that it heals years of pain? When it is grounded and flows from love. As for the why, there are many reasons it is powerful, but here are three.

1. Vulnerability in confession communicates the extent of our love for someone. A heart of confession is open, honest, contrite, humble, and doesn’t care just about itself but also others. When we are willing to be naked, vulnerable, weak and to set our pride aside it reveals our love for the other person. If we didn’t love them we wouldn’t be willing to be so open and exposed. Our willingness to unveil our souls is powerful because it infuses truth and love into the relationship

2. Words have power. Created in God’s image our words have tremendous power. They can heal or damage. Openly stating that we have caused hurt, though often unintentionally, frees and heals the hearer. Confessions are words of love, which are more potent than words of pain.

3. Truth manifests love. The more we see and know about ourselves and others in the light of God’s truth, the more we can truly love. Knowledge brings understanding which fosters love, which sets us free.

We are made to love and for that reason most of what we do involves others including our healing and theirs. Philippians 2:4 Confession is just as much about the other person as it is about us. God may know, we may know but they don’t know our heart until we speak it. When we put our pride aside, acknowledge the pain we feel and caused we love. The reward is two-fold; we are more fully freed and healed from our brokenness and so are they. Even if others aren’t ready to confess their part in creating pain, the love we show will help heal their brokenness and put them on a path of being able to face their own pain and the pain they caused.

Confession doesn’t promise something similar won’t happen again. It expresses our hearts that we don’t desire to hurt. We are human and putting off our old self and living in the new life is a process. Letting others see into our hearts to know that we desire to give love not pain covers a multitude of sins.


by 1 Comment

God’s Toolbox: Our Past

 God’s Toolbox: Our Past

 

Over the past couple of years, God has been unpacking my past. He has shown me the deep seeded lies I’ve lived by since childhood and the ripple affect they caused of bad decisions, poor behaviors, destructive relationships, depression, and on and on.  It is thought provoking to see how a couple of lies can create so much damage.

I have often viewed the things of my past as a bunch of screw ups and mistakes that revealed a person in need of a complete overhaul. They were things that didn’t have to happen but what was done was done and I needed God to come in and clean things up. I tried to be the sweeper but I just flung dirt around.

But the other night, my insightful husband re-framed it for me.

He said it isn’t that my past, his or anyone else’s is a big mess that would be better off voided like a bad check, but all the things we went through brought us to where we are today. Each detail served a purpose in chiseling us into who we are. We went through those things to grow and learn what we needed to learn.

I started thinking about what he said and though the things I faced were painful, hard, and sometimes pushed me to the edge of insanity, he was right. Looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing. I can’t believe I am saying that, but you know it is true. Through each experience God has taught me His wisdom that I wouldn’t have learned otherwise.

As God’s kids what we consider the wreckage of our lives are His tools to teach us what we need to learn, if we are willing. If we aren’t willing we remain on the hamster wheel running in the same destructive circles until we decide to sit up and listen.  A past unaddressed remains a controlling force in our lives. We aren’t to live in the past, but grow from it and live free.

As a good teacher, God won’t let us move on to the next level until we learn our ABCs. It is either keep running or starting listening. And the lessons are much deeper than we are a mess in need of Him. Each situation holds a deeper truth that will surprise you, as I am finding out.

This earthly existence is a training ground. It is a place where our spirits learn that our way is not the way to go and God’s is.  We are supposed to make mistakes that is how we learn that only God’s ways bring life, joy, peace, and intimacy with Him.  We start going backwards if we get wrapped up in this life and cease to realize that everything is to bring us into union with God.

Trying out many different paths that promised success and failing miserably inside and out is what brought me to my knees and when I fell before Him in every area of my life; I started to live the life I desired for the first time. So if everything I went through was to bring me closer to God and to create unity between us in purpose, will and desire – yeah it was all worth it and I am thankful for it.