Here is one more dream instructing me during these wilderness tests . . . I’ve written a lot about dreams lately as God has been using them to show me my heart among other truths I need to know. Where the other two dreams (Preparing for God’s Calling, Wilderness Tests – God’s Care) I shared revealed doubts and fears deep in my heart, this one was a bit different . . .
In my dream, my eyesight started to get blurry. No matter what I did my eyes wouldn’t clear up. My vision became so blurred that people and objects were shapeless blobs. Needless to say it made me anxious. At one point, I was holding my cousin’s new baby and almost dropped him as I stumbled over a chair. Fortunately my aunt was there to brace me. After bumbling around for awhile here and there, it was time to get dressed for some formal function/party I was attending that night. But my eyesight was so poor; I didn’t know how I was going to get ready (hair, makeup, all that stuff). Then a young blonde-hair woman said she would help me. The sweetness in her demeanor and in her voice gave me a peace in my spirit. I didn’t know her, but it didn’t matter. She was very willing to help me out. As we went back to the dressing room, I looked in the mirror and I saw that my hazel eyes had turned a crystal clear blue. There was still a haze covering them as they were still transforming but I stood amazed. A wave of encouragement came over me as I realized they were blurry because they were going through this change.
As I sought out the meaning of this dream the next day during my quiet time, this is what I felt it meant. It’s a reflection of what is happening in my life – a transformation within my soul as God tests, renews and prepares me. Eyes are the windows to the soul. A change in color from hazel to blue reflected God’s work in me through this time of testing. The blurriness inhibiting me from seeing clearly and moving about represented how I feel about my situation, the unknown and the uncertainty, which I’ve talked about in previous posts.
During this trial, as my trust is tested I feel at times like I’m bumbling around. But it’s this uncertainty that beckons me to trust and rest in God’s Truth because if not now then when? Is He my God or isn’t He? Though circumstances seem undefined or uncertain, there is hope because if I look (as I did in the mirror) I will see God is working in my soul and using the circumstances to mold my heart and spirit for His will and purposes. He is breaking my trust in other things, so that it will be in Him as it should be. As He works, He is filling me with His living waters in areas that need a refreshing.
I thought the blonde girl represented an angel helping me as I went through this time. I felt God say that all that is happening is under His watchful eye and care. He is taking care of my needs. He is with me every step. He is working it all out in the perfect way. That morning after my dream I got a deep sense that everything is happening as it should. I’m in my Maker’s hands and He is molding me according to His desire and will, which ultimately is what will most fulfill me as well. My part is to yield to that molding, trust Him and above all believe in His promises to me.
In this trial, my trust is breaking in other things and I know that is so it will be established more firmly on Him. When it’s in Him then crystal blue living waters can freely flow through my soul and circumstances. This dream was more of a look from God’s perspective, which is the perspective I need to focus on.
Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and HIS righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
This past week God adjusted my perspective in two significant ways.
Years ago, God opened my eyes to the powerful truth of Matthew 6:33. If I simply focused on seeking Him and His righteousness, then He would take care of the rest. I lived by this truth and put all aside and sought Him. The freedom was remarkable, and He did take care of everything else. My focus would wane here and there, but for the most part it was on seeking His kingdom and His righteousness.
But lately my perspective started to alter and stay in that altered state. As God exposed my heart this past week, it unveiled the two areas that had slipped to the top of my seeking heart instead of His kingdom and His righteousness.
Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
First, I started putting seeking my life purpose above seeking His kingdom (His presence) in my life. I was getting too wrapped up and anxious about the next steps. God reminded me that seeking Him comes first, then all else follows. When we seek Him, we are able to trust Him with the rest. We are able to let go and know He is leading and guiding us in the perfect way right now.
When we seek God’s kingdom, our focus is on His love among His other characteristics. We can let go and trust God with areas of our lives, like our life purpose, when we trust in His love toward us. If we deeply believe in His love, then we would never worry or be anxious for anything. We would pray and trust all to His care. We would let go of all concern, trust He is working it out in our lives, and fall into His arms, free without holding onto anything.
However, when we doubt His love, we hold onto our ways and expectations of how our life should be playing out. We get nervous, anxious, and doubt He is in the midst of our situation. We question if He is helping us or wants to. We aren’t able to trust in His ways, which are very different from our own. We aren’t able to fully trust He will fulfill our desires like living a purposeful and meaningful life, good health, fulfilling relationships, emotional deliverance, and provision. Therefore, we try to take control, push forward and hold onto our methods and ideas because we think life isn’t playing out as it should if He was helping us. We intervene trying to make our life fit how we think it should be moving forward.
God reminded me that all is secondary to seeking His Kingdom. If we seek Him then the rest follows as it should. When we seek His kingdom, our focus is on Him and all that He is.
Joel 2:13b And rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil.
This morning God impressed this verse upon me. Do I really trust in His great kindness, mercy, grace, and patience in my life? If I do, why am I worried or anxious about anything? When we seek and focus on God, our trust grows in His immense love and we are able to let go of what we are holding onto other than Him because we know He has us in His protective embrace.
God tells us He is a good Father and knows our needs and will provide for them. We are to put everything in His trust and focus on seeking a deep relationship with Him. Matthew 6:24-32, Matthew 7:11
Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and HIS righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
Second, in seeking for healing in a particular area, my focus moved from being on God’s righteousness to my own. My obedience was about my righteousness, not love. My healing was about my righteousness, not His love. If I obeyed God near perfectly in a particular area, then I’ll be healed – was what I thought. By focusing on my obedience as the solution to being healed, my thoughts were about my righteousness not His.
Now, sin can be connected to health issues. Sin corrupts, destroys, decays. And when we are walking in sin then our bodies can suffer for it. Sometimes we suffer in our bodies to draw attention to a sin we are living in that we need to repent of and seek deliverance from. Sin hurts us and others. God doesn’t want us living in it blindly as we sometimes do. Physical aliments can be a way to get our attention that something is amiss in our spirit. However, healing comes from the acceptance of God’s love and mercy toward us, nothing that we do. We trust in His mercy alone, in Christ’s righteousness that covers us for healing. When it was about me walking in “perfect” obedience for healing, it became about my righteousness. God doesn’t want us to be slaves of righteousness, but sons of righteousness – (meaning we are righteous because we are born of Him)
God also reminded me that all I do is to be driven by love. 1 Corinthians 16:14 We are to be obedient to His Word, but the motive of the heart is love nothing else – like punishment and reward. I needed to let go of the punishment and reward focus in this area and let my attention rest on letting His love flow through me for what He was asking me to do. Obedience is about love. John 14:23 We do what we do because we love God.
Instead of trusting in my obedience (my righteousness) for healing, I needed trust in Christ’s righteousness, and then walk according to His ways out of love not punishment and reward.
With these two adjustments of focusing on seeking His kingdom and His righteousness, incredible burdens were lifted. I had no idea now much I was carrying. I’m so thankful for the Spirit’s instruction in these areas – truly an incredible week.
Poor little thing . . . when Sophie got spayed, she wore a plastic collar for several weeks. Unlike her brother, Malcolm, who was back to normal the next day, she carried the burden of this plastic garb. Though uncomfortable and hindering to her activities, it was necessary for her to properly heal. Without it, she would yank out her stitches, reopen the incision, cause an infection, and delay the healing for weeks – making the situation much worse.
When we first brought her home, the collar was so big she could hardly lift her little head, use the litter box (as it got stuck in the sand), eat and drink. She walked pushing it along the floor. Our hearts broke. We tried a bandage; it didn’t last two seconds. Why the vet put that huge collar on her I don’t know. We cut it to fit her, yet left it big enough so she couldn’t access her stitches. Though smaller, her sleeping, eating, and playing were much more uncomfortable.
Sophie
During the first week, the most critical because she could do the most damage, my eyes hardly left her little frame. If she or Malcolm removed the collar and she tore out the stitches, she would be in a mess. After several days, she stopped trying to remove it; she finally surrendered.
We both wanted her stitches out, Sophie and us. She wanted them out now, but that would have led to more pain and a longer healing process. We wanted them out AND wanted her healed in the best possible way; therefore she had to endure the collar.
Sophie’s situation reminded me of our journey with God. As God’s child, we desire to be who He created us to be, and do the good works He has planned for us. Ephesians 2:10 He places desires in us to motivate and direct us toward these goals. The desires are planted in our hearts, but it’s God who directs our steps to manifesting them. Proverbs 16:9 Often, His path is different from our own and often longer. Like Sophie, the desire was the same, but the paths to getting there were different. She needed the collar to get to where she wanted to be, though she didn’t realize it.
God renews, heals and shapes us to move us into becoming new creations in Him and into the works He has planned for us. Sometimes, the best path has difficulties, like wearing that collar. It’s through difficulties that we are broken, refined, and rebuilt. It can be uncomfortable and seem unnecessary as we don’t always understand why we need the trial. We can feel hindered in doing what we should be doing like Sophie. Yet, with God all is purposeful and for a reason. He won’t give us more than we can handle. Our burdens are the perfect fit to accomplish what is necessary. They provide the best possible journey to prepare us for the life God desires for us, which is ultimately our desire.
Malcolm & Sophie
Further, we can’t compare our path to another’s. What is best for us may not be best for someone else. Therefore, comparing our journey to another’s doesn’t make sense. Unlike Sophie, Malcolm didn’t need a collar. Didn’t seem fair, but they received exactly what they needed to get them to their desired state. We need to trust our caretaker, God, who especially during trying times has a watchful eye upon us, is allowing in our lives what needs to occur so that we end up where we need to be.
When Sophie, stopped fighting the collar and surrendered to it, her life got easier and less stressed. In a similar way, when we are obedient to what God tells us to do, we move forward more easily. Disobedience is a hindrance. Because of God’s grace, we sometimes take advantage and are disobedient to what He tells us to do, but it’s we who suffer for it. It delays our progress to where we want to be. We have to trust His path and trust eases the stress. Though the path is difficult, it’s THE path by which we will experience deep healing, growth and freedom. God doesn’t only care about the works He has planned for us, but the state of our soul. HIS path prepares us for what He has in store.
Our love for Sophie is tremendous, yet how much more is the love of God for us? Our hearts broke for her to wear the collar, but it was for her good. It may be difficult for God to see us in our hardships, but He knows it’s the best. His love is perfect.
Our path to our desires can be difficult and a process. We are battling against the flesh (our self-will wanting to do it our way) and having to let go of being in control and instead trust God in all His ways. We want instant, but instant is a rarity with God. Deep transformation is a journey. And it’s through the journey we build a deep intimacy with Him. God is a trustworthy and faithful Shepherd watching us every step. Psalm 32:8 We have nothing to fear. He wants us to be in an abundant life more than we do. Our part is to trust and obey what He calls us to do today and trust Him with the outcome (our desires).
Sophie was much happier in the end for having worn that collar. Had we done it her way, she would have been much worse. We too are better for the trials God takes us through because we end up in a better place in our soul. As God’s child, if we are abiding in His Truth and seeking His will, we can trust the path we are on is where we need to be, and He is leading us to where we want to be, His way.
Our soul is like a territory held in bondage by an enemy. When we are awakened to the state of our soul, then we realize our need for someone mightier (Jesus Christ) than ourselves and our enemy to deliver us from the entrapment. When we accept that Jesus is the One to deliver us, then He comes and claims the beachfront of our lives. So we are His, however, aspects of our soul are still untouched territory. As we abide in His Word and are willing and listening, bit by bit Jesus makes advances taking over the territory of our soul as King. Under His Kingship, we live free and as we were created to live. I want to explore some ways He makes those advances.
For years I experienced pain in my body in reoccurring areas. It wasn’t unbearable, but at my young age, it was far more than I should be experiencing. I knew something was way off. I tried many external remedies but nothing worked, but each “cure” presented a new hope. A friend told me about what a Cranial Sacral Therapist had done for her, so I found someone in my area. During the session, as she was working on my neck and head, she asked me if I had experienced any trauma in that area as a child. At first I thought no, but then as I laid there several experiences came to mind, but they weren’t of a physical nature but an emotional one. That thought process led me to see a deep trauma in my beliefs – that I lacked a sense of value for myself. Until that point, I never fully realized this debilitating belief. I went home knowing I had stumbled upon something significant. I realized I needed to stop looking outward for solutions and look inward.
As I brought this issue into my quiet time with God, He started unraveling it bit by bit. It ended up being a core issue that underscored many other issues (almost all of them, including my pain). I started to see the massive ripple affect of that ill-belief spreading to every area of my life. Eagerly, I prayed and listened to God’s instruction, and He started laying it all out. He showed me how most of my thoughts, actions, and decisions were tied to a lack of value for myself. He showed me where this idea started and was reinforced in childhood. As He took me back to painful memories, ones I feared to face or simply didn’t want to out of pride, I travelled with Him trusting His guidance and He covered them with His love, truth and forgiveness. As pain appeared in other areas in my body, I listened and He led me to other issues all related to my core one. He opened up each area of anger, pain, and fear, and brought in His truth. When He was done, I held an unchanging priceless value in myself as His child. However, many of my habitual ways of responding and acting were still reflective of that girl who had no value. Through awareness, abiding in His Word and prayer, those actions started to fade and were replaced by ones based on who I truly am as His unique creation and this transition is in progress today.
I share this story, because 1) it demonstrates a type of progression in how the territory of our soul is conquered by God, and 2) many people have this core issue of a lack of value (from childhood rejection, abuse, neglect, modeling of parents, and so on). Some know it and many deny it, but I see it in many people. When we lack value we spend our lives trying to prove and earn our worthiness and most of what we do is a result of this lack of value, therefore, we aren’t able to be completely surrendered to God’s will. We are more driven to prove or earn our worthiness. God calls us to be surrendered completely to Him and that surrender is a journey. For many facing core issues is a significant part of that journey. But we have to stop the madness of trying to prove and earn and abide in God’s presence and seek His deliverance. God wants us out of that bondage and will allow or do what it takes in our lives to bring us to this understanding, to healing and freedom.
The Progression of Conquering Our Soul
First, an uncomfortable situation arises in our life to get us seeking, like a physical aliment (as I had), intense trial, or difficult relationship. We live in blindness to our own soul and something has to wake us up. When all is fine, we don’t seek. But when things aren’t, it’s to push us to search from the depth of our soul. Often what starts us seeking is something that gets our full attention, and it is different for different people. How better to get our attention than with something we really care about?
Second, from seeking we get a word of truth about the state of our soul that comes to us through a dream, person, the Spirit, or God’s Word. When that word or insight resonates strongly with us, like the issue of value did for me, this is our first awareness of seeing Christ on the edge of this section of our soul ready to take it over and deliver us.
Third, through spiritual weaponry (like faith, prayer, meditating on His Word, the Bible, and /or fasting) the anchor of that stronghold is uprooted. For me the stronghold was the lie I had no value, God uprooted that ill-belief and replaced it with the truth that I have infinite unchanging value. One point on fasting, it is a tool that when God calls us to use it (He decision not ours), it can be extremely powerful. It’s an act of faith that we are completely reliant on His Word for life. Matthew 17:19-21
Fourth, once the anchor is uprooted then there is a time (usually much longer) of restructuring and rebuilding, like when a land is taken over by a new regime it has to be established on their rules. As the rebuilding occurs in this certain area, many issues may spring up that are related to that area like anger, modeling (what we learned from our parents), and unforgiveness. Each one of these has to be addressed and replaced with truth and love. This work of rebuilding is God’s. Our part is to seek His deliverance, listen to and obey His instruction, abide in His Word that cuts through our soul healing and restoring, pray, and hold onto His truth as it’s established in us.
After believing lies for so long it sometimes takes awhile for the truth to truly be ours. Because of the strong connections in our brain established from acting certain ways for so long, it sometimes takes awhile for us to act according to the deliverance that is happening in our soul. But once the anchor is uprooted, then we should see progress forward however slow. Building a new way of behaving requires great patience, trust and perseverance. It requires that we trust God who begun a good work in us will complete it (Philippians 1:6). As this area is rebuilt, God moves onto the next one to conquer. If we are diligent to heed His instruction, follow and trust in Him to do what He promises to do, we will experience true freedom in our soul. The good news is that once our core issue is addressed it resolves many other issues that came from it. Though, it may be a longer process initially, it is delivering us from many problems in our lives.
If you are struggling right now, perhaps it is the Spirit trying to get your attention. Ask and seek why you are going through what you are. Be aware of insights you have about your situation. Pray about them don’t ignore or push them to the side. Dive into them. They may be God on the forefront ready to move and waiting for you to call Him in. Deliverance requires your involvement. Let His pure Word penetrate your heart, pray, meditate on His truth daily and follow His direction and He will take over and rebuild you into the new creation you are in Him.
In my experience this process can be painful at times as our depths are unraveled and exposed and it isn’t instant by any means. It is a journey, sometimes taking years, but He is faithful to finish what He began. What are a couple of years compared to a lifetime of freedom? Most of us give up. Stop trusting. Stop seeking deliverance. Stop listening. Stop abiding in His Word. Don’t give up. Believe God is good and desires you to be free. And remember it is God who starts, directs, and completes this journey. It is by the Spirit’s lead not our own initiative.
Matthew 7:11 If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!
Below is a video of an insight I wanted to share with you about love. I suppose this is love week 😉 Check out my post from Monday, A Lesson in Love from My Cats too.
Someone made a comment on my post Fear of God – Beginning of Wisdom about how though I was blessed with a wonderful earthly father, many aren’t. I was asked to address those who haven’t been so fortunate. I don’t necessary think I’m most qualified to address such an issue, but I wanted to honor the request and share with you want I have learned from my friends who have had issues with their fathers. I was thankful for the suggestion because many of my friends fall into the latter category. In fact, this past week as I was visiting my family many conversations came up about the impact of fathers. We talked about the effects of no fathers, fathers who neglected, over protected, who loved. Here are my thoughts . . .
Unfortunately, many men have done a poor job as a father. Like the rest of us they are fallen and far from perfect. But the role they have has such an impact in our lives that their actions effect us more than most. Fatherhood is a great responsibility. It’s a job that reveals a man’s greatest weaknesses and to those he is supposed to love the most. As a result of those weaknesses, some have abandoned, neglected, abused, and overly controlled their children. Among my friends those who didn’t have a good experience with their fathers instead had with a relationship of lack that left them with deep wounds, anger, pain, disoriented paths, and vast voids in their lives.
So if the experience with your father left a huge void or vaults of pain in your life, how can you draw near to a God who says He is your father? How do you know really what that truly means? How can you trust God to be your father, when your only experience of a father was none at all or crappy?
Initially how we view God is related to how we viewed our father. We carry over the framework given to us from our father to God. But this obviously isn’t where we are to stay mentally or emotionally – whether our experience was good or bad – we each need to seek God as He is and if we do He will teach us and show us who He is. He is able to give us what we never had in our earthly relationships, if we seek. John 14:21
Talking to one of my friends about her experience with her dad, she said, it’s true he left a big hole in my soul, but it provided a larger place for God to fill. Because of that lack it pushed me closer to God seeking from Him what I didn’t get from my dad. I have been blessed to know and depend on God in this way.
This is the treasure in broken relationships; God comes into the brokenness in such intimate way. Wounded souls gain a special relationship that is nourishing and rich with God because of the lack they had. They deeply connect with Him in a way they otherwise wouldn’t.
Often it’s the void, in whatever area of our lives that drives us to seek God with passion with our hearts, souls and minds. The wound, the pain, and the emptiness are powerful drivers. God uses these driving forces to turn something deeply painful into something amazingly blessed. Our fathers have a big impact in our lives, how much more our heavenly Father if we let Him in into the depths of our pain and sorrow? It’s about perspective. We can either see our past experiences as a never ending wound in our lives or we can see it as an opportunity to experience the presence of God in a very intimate and personal way. Where do you want to be? Which one are you fostering in your life?
Our earthly fathers, whether good or bad, are to point and drive us to our heavenly Father.
A mistake often made is getting caught up in looking to our earthly fathers to repair the damage they left behind. We aren’t to look to them but God. God is our eternal Father; our earthly fathers are but a vapor Psalm 39:5. We need to be careful not to put too much focus on the temporary because then we neglect the eternal. We are to seek God to complete and fill us, to heal and restore us. As for our earthly fathers we have to abandon the hold they have on us, or we will remain living out our lives in a reaction to theirs. We are called to live in the spirit in the newness of life, not the past. With God’s grace we can. Only God can truly enable us to move forward. Though, I haven’t had to do with my father, I have in other areas. Freedom comes from Him, and He is able to set us free from whatever binds our souls. As long as we look to our earthly fathers to play a part in delivering us from the pain we are looking in the wrong place and often will be greatly disappointed.
You can’t wait on them to change, to apologize, to make good for the damage they did. Because many never will due to blindness to their own lack. The truth is we are fallen. We cause others pain. We damage with our actions and our words. We all fall short. God is offering freedom from that bondage of pain caused by others. It is a process no doubt especially with our fathers, but is a journey that in the end will fill you with gratitude for the earthly father you had because of what it brought to you in your relationship with God. It may be hard to believe, but God loves you more than you know. He wants to give you what you never had if you will open yourself up to Him. He wants to go into the reservoir of that pain and abide, and turn it into rivers of love.
Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds.
Romans 8:15 For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.”
If you are God’s, you have a new Father, embrace Him.
The other day as I was walking on the beach, I reflected upon on the bleakness of our times contrasted to the beautiful truth of God’s Kingdom here on earth. I thought about how many people are waiting for heaven when God has given us access to His Kingdom now – something few truly enter into. Most are sitting on the sideline waiting and missing out on an incredible journey now. The reflection took me back to that poignant moment in my walk – the realization of the realness of His Kingdom here on earth and in my life.
The Realness of the Kingdom on Earth
One morning many years ago, my husband came into the kitchen where I was sitting having my quiet time. He said, “Can I interrupt you for a moment?” “Sure!” I said. I’m always ready to hear an insight. He said (paraphrasing) from what he was reading and what the spirit was teaching the Kingdom of God in our lives is just as real as this physical life. Therefore, dwelling it affects our earthly lives now in very powerful and real ways. We are called to a different existence now. His words confirmed what I had been learning. Often God teaches us individually similar truths at similar times – it never ceases to amaze us.
We dived into an extraordinary conversation about the Kingdom. We volleyed back and forth on what God was showing us. Our study, our circumstances, and our conversation were uncovering this mind altering truth. God was unveiling the mystery of His Kingdom. That day catapulted our lives in a new direction. The Kingdom of God became real like the sand that runs through your fingers and the surf that dashes across your feet. We discern it differently than the physical world but its affect on us is more potent than what we see. The impact in our lives from dwelling in God’s Kingdom affects our health, family, marriage, work, everything. It isn’t pie in the sky; it’s pie you eat. We were transitioning from hearing the truth of the Kingdom to it becoming our home. It’s like hearing about a country verses traveling there.
What is the Kingdom of God?
The Kingdom of God is within us. It is God’s Spirit within us. It is Him conquering the territory of our soul and moving in as King and us stepping aside. It is us being reconciled back to God through Christ’s sacrifice and dwelling in the presence of God and all that He is. In His presence, His Kingdom, I’ve experienced in substantive ways His love, mercy, truth, joy, peace, rest, comfort, deliverance, healing, power, strength, protection, provision, purity, goodness, purpose, beauty, wisdom, counsel, freedom, instruction, perfection, and sovereignty – all far beyond what the world offers. And when those things fill your life your life changes dramatically. Meditating on what He has given me in each one of these is something I often do. As we seek God’s face with our heart and soul in the truth of His Word, then these treasures become apart of our lives. It’s tremendous as I’m discovering.
The Focus of Jesus’ Teaching
Luke 4:43 but He said to them, “I must preach the kingdom of God to the other cities also, because for this purpose I have been sent.”
The Kingdom is the focus of Jesus’ teaching. It is the reason He came to earth. It is the place He opened to us with His eternal sacrifice, as His gift of righteousness opened the door. We need His righteousness because we have none and we only enter this Kingdom if we are spotless. The travesty is many are spiritually born and given this gift, but are stuck in the birth canal. If we neglect to enter in, learn, seek, and explore this new place then we abandon what Jesus brought us, abundant life. For God is life. It’s something we seek with our spiritual eyes, because it isn’t discerned with our physical eyes, but its power in our lives that dominates everything we do see.
The world functions by its wisdom and we, the children of God, by God’s. Just as we are born into the physical world, we are born into this spiritual one. For those who aren’t born into the spiritual, their lives function and are limited by the rules of the physical world. For us who have been spiritually born, we have a new set of rules that govern our lives as we live according to God’s wisdom. How we succeed, fulfill our dreams, define our purpose, make decisions, and obtain wisdom; and what brings joy, pleasure, and happiness are some of the areas where we learn and enjoy a new way of living.
The Journey into the Kingdom
Coming to understand how to live in our new life takes time. Just as we grow physically learning to function in the earthly realm, we grow spiritually. In order to do both we eat. In one we consume food, in the other the Truth, the Word. If we don’t nourish our spirits we won’t mature and will continue to live as we always have, outside His promises. How many mal-nourished Christians do you see? How many do you see feasting on the pure Word, and not man’s watered-down interpretation? If we ate more of His pure truth we would grow and live as we are called in His presence and not as mere men. 1 Corinthians 3:3 Why don’t you see the affects of the Kingdom in people’s lives? Because they aren’t eating or aren’t eating and digesting the pure Word of God.
For us to know and live in the Kingdom was and still is Christ’s passion. We don’t have to wait until heaven to experience a life with God that far exceeds what the world offers. Our response to Jesus’ gift of His life that allows us entrance into this world is seeking understanding and belief in all the promises of our new home. If we don’t take the time to discover its treasures, we never leave the airport. We stay just outside a world that would transform our lives. We remain in the wasteland of endless striving and insatiable hungers. Jesus came to give us life, life in His Kingdom. In it we find the abundant life He came to give. As His bride, it is our part to enter in and explore and we do by stirring the deep.
Verses to ponder about the treasures of God’s kingdom:
With a background in psychology, I’m fascinated with why people do what they do including me. I believe seeking understanding of ourselves and others is tremendously valuable because a deeper understanding leads to compassion and true love.
However, this past week God taught me an important lesson — to have a more acute awareness of the conversations, circumstances and people that pull me into a mindset where I’m focusing on the flesh instead of the spirit side of me.
It is a temptation for me to dive into the whys of my life hoping that understanding will spawn a change for the parts of me I don’t like. The first step of change is knowing what needs changing. And to understand what needs changing we need to know the source of the problem. However, what I learned is summed up in Philippians 3:13 “Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,”
In Christ we are a new creation. It is an incredible gift because, we have a new spirit connected to God that breathes new life into our bodies. Romans 8:11 We no longer strive to live by our flesh or self-will (those things which are behind) but by God’s will (those things that are ahead). Children of God desire God and His ways, but there’s a part of us that pops up unwanted and unexpectedly driving us against God’s will instead of along side. This part of us that is contrary to God’s truth and wisdom is referred to as the old man, old nature, carnal nature, flesh, self-will, and carnal mind. Though we have God’s spirit dwelling within us, remnants (sometimes huge chunks) of our carnal nature remain as long as we live in these flesh bodies. Once we are born of God, we get a bad case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, because our self-will co-exists with His will in us.
This duality creates an internal conflict in our souls. It is the pressing affliction of a believer. We want to do one thing but we do another. What I don’t like about myself stems from this flesh-life. Paul talks about this internal conflict in Romans 7 -8. He doesn’t say to try to tame, repair, or fix it. Instead we are to reckon ourselves dead to it and alive in Christ. Romans 6:11 In other words, we need to focus on our spirit that is of God. We need to push forward mentally in our spirit life. What we focus on grows. At any one time we are either focused on the flesh or the spirit. And focusing on the flesh (our will and wisdom) breeds death and focusing on the spirit (God’s will and wisdom) brings life. Romans 8:6
What I learned this past week – was how easily this flesh focus can slip in and I need to have a deeper awareness of those things (conversations, circumstances, and people) that pull me into that carnal mindset. This carnal part of us is corrupt and always will be. It has a focus contrary to God’s ways and wisdom. I don’t need to waste my time talking or thinking about it because I can’t fix, repair or tame it anyway. I’ve learned that it is what it is – so why dwell on it? God has set me free from it – so why live in bondage by focusing on it? He has given me a new life to focus on and seek understanding in.
Because of this duality of flesh and spirit, at any one moment we are either operating in the flesh or in the spirit. Which one is dominating affects everything; how we think, speak, act and feel. When we operate with a flesh mind we are fearful, overwhelmed, frustrated, discouraged, hopeless, depressed, jealous, judgmental, critical, and selfish. Our trust has shifted from God to ourselves. We aren’t living in God’s truth and promises that He is our provider, protector, defender, comfort, rest, freedom, peace, power, and life.
As I draw close to God, discerning when I’m in the flesh verses the spirit is becoming clearer. In the flesh, I feel burdened, frustrated, discouraged. I become self-focused, withdrawn and ineffective in my life. Those emotions are flags that my focus is on the flesh and it is time to pray asking God to pull me out of my mind trap. It can be difficult when I give into the carnal mind to get out of it. When I try on my own I run in circles, but when I cry out to God He always brings me out.
Our focus is to be on the spirit and building it up in our lives which we do by stirring the deep. Stirring the deep (spending one-on-one time building intimacy with God through His Word) nourishes our spirits enabling us to live from the spirit and not the flesh. It empowers our spirit and that is one of many reasons we need to dive into the Word daily. And we have to look out for those traps that ensnare us to focusing on the flesh. We need to be aware of those triggers, times, circumstances or people that tempt us to be in flesh-minded because they can pull us down to a carnal mind of fear, bondage, and pride. We need to flood our minds with God’s truth so that in those moments we have given ourselves a choice through awareness of whose voice we are going to listen to. Ephesians 4: 22-24
In reflection of Mother’s Day yesterday, I want to share with you one of my most cherished relationships, the friendship I have with my mother – a one of a kind.
My Mom and Me
Over the years, my mom has become not only one of my most adored friends, but also she understands me more than most. In Social Intelligence, Daniel Goleman talks about how children take on characteristics of their parents – it is fascinating. He explains the neuroscience behind what I have experienced in my relationship with my mom. She and I share not only similar traits but similar “issues”. Her struggles are very similar to mine because as a child I developed in her reflection.
This mirroring is a great blessing because I have someone close to me, whose love abounds toward me, who I can be completely vulnerable with, and who understands!! There is no glazing over of eyes, but a depth that says, yes I know, wrapped in abundant love, not judgment or disapproval. We truly have shared in each others pain, because we both have experienced it in varying degrees. Because of our similarities we are a tremendous support, encouragement and comfort to one another. There is no one who can take her place, because no one understands what I face like she does, and vice versa.
I wish this relationship for everyone because the intimacy is precious and unique. However, I think many don’t because they have resentment toward their mothers (like I once had) or they can’t accept their imperfections; because it is too hard to admit that they may be a bit like their parents. Often the traits we don’t like about others are the traits we don’t like about ourselves – whether we are conscious of it or not. As a result, we keep at a distance from seeking to really know and understand our mothers. When I was younger I convinced myself I was nothing like my mom. I resented certain ways that she was. What a fool I was on many levels. Only when I was open to all that she was did I really begin to learn about her and thus about me and the healing began in our relationship and in us.
I am my mother’s daughter. I am a part of her.
Interestingly, when I accepted that we shared similar issues that is when the healing began. As long as we suppress and deny our inner “stuff” the more it grows and festers. Healing comes with acknowledgement. First you have to acknowledge the problem before it can be fixed. I think God created this mirroring affect with our parents so that we have a built in reflection of ourselves, support, encouragement and someone to help us grow past out issues.
If there are things about your mom you don’t like. Take a closer examination. Perhaps there is some of her issues in you that you need to acknowledge so you can grow past them. And once you realize that it is okay to share in those vulnerabilities, then the healing begins and the journey to freedom can be shared with a woman who understands more than anyone else. And in the process a sweet intimacy is created unlike any other.
William Shakespeare said the eyes are the windows to the soul. God says they are the lamp of the body. If the eyes are good, the body is full of light. If they are bad, the body is full of darkness. Luke 11:34
The eyes, representing what we focus on and attend to, can fill us with light (goodness) or darkness (evil). They are the opening of our soul through which things flow. Therefore, we have to be very careful what we focus on and bring into our soul because it affects our entire body, soul and spirit.
The past couple of days I have been thinking about the significance of this truth.
What do I focus on throughout the day? What am I taking into my soul? Is it good, helpful, productive or is it negative, destructive, and misleading? What we allow to come into our souls either leads us to or away from God and His truth. And lately little things have been trying to slip in that shouldn’t be.
It is amazing how the world’s philosophies creep into our lives. Constantly the world is pursuing us to trust in its ways, to focus on its concerns, and to be enraptured by its fears. And it is relentless in its pursuit. It wants to own us and take us captive to do its will. 2 Timothy 2:26 And often it is so subtle we don’t recognize it for what it is – contrary to God’s truth. Here are three subtleties that often try to creep into my life.
Our physical health. Who or what do we look to for healing; drugs, pharmaceuticals, doctors, or natural remedies? God is our healer. The things of this world can remedy pains but without God they are useless. Asa, one of the kings of Judah, looked to the physicians and not to God and died as a result. 2 Chronicles 16:12-13. God created many wonderful remedies and often uses them to heal and restore, but without God working in them, those things are worthless. He is their potency. He is life. The only reason they work is His mercy. When we start to trust in them, we lose focus, the world creeps in and darkness starts to take over.
Our soul’s health. What or who do we trust for our soul’s health; self-help books, programs, seminars, or therapists? There are many truths out there about our inner health and what helps and what hurts, but who are we trusting to do that work in us? We are to trust God. Philippians 2:13 He works in us as Master Creator. When we follow the world’s methods it is like putting band aids over gushing wounds. When we trust God He is a diligent surgeon who heals us through and through. I have walked both paths – there is no comparison between the work we try to do and what God does in us. Yet, sometimes the world’s ways still tempt me.
Our provision. Do we trust in this world’s system to provide? When our paycheck comes from our boss it is easy to start trusting in him, our work, our abilities, or our skills to provide for us. When we think God is too slow in bringing what we want or need we become like the Israelites at the bottom of Mount Sinai. Exodus 32 When Moses was gone too long, they made a golden calf to trust and worship. When we feel God takes too long in providing we justify He needs our help and we start concocting our own schemes to provide. God is in control of our paths, not us, and not another man. God gives us a job to do. We need to do that work following His lead and leave the provision up to Him.
Those of the world only have this world for their help and hope. They have to trust it because it is all they have. But as God’s bride, we are called out of this world and are to trust Him for everything. We are no longer alone in this world or left to its whims. As our Husband, God wants to provide all. We live by a different set of rules. We live by a different power and strength – not ours but His. We have God Almighty on our side working for and in us. Therefore, we don’t have to worry and chase after these things as the world does. We are free from being concerned about them because God has moved in as our provider in every area. He takes care of our lives so we can focus on Him. Matthew 6:24-34
When we focus on God and His truth, we are pouring light into our souls. We are filling our eyes with His goodness and our bodies, souls and spirits thrive. If we flood our eyes with the concerns of this world then we are pouring in darkness and our lives will suffer.
Guard your eyes, the windows to your soul, for they determine if you live a life abundantly in Him or a life of lack trapped in the schemes of this world.
Here is one more dream instructing me during these wilderness tests . . . I’ve written a lot about dreams lately as God has been using them to show me my heart among other truths I need to know. Where the other two dreams (Preparing for God’s Calling, Wilderness Tests – God’s Care) I shared revealed doubts and fears deep in my heart, this one was a bit different . . .
Living Light 