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Grace: A license to sin?

Grace: A License to Sin?

For years, I thought sins (anything contrary to God’s truth and ways), the little ones, were not that big of a deal. I assumed they were a part of life. On some level, I accepted them. On some level I enjoyed them – though it was a false joy proliferating pain. How often do you hear among professing believers, “well, we ARE sinners”, as if it’s an excuse for the little sins we knowingly sow? Whether true or not, after hearing something often enough you begin to believe it.

I “faithfully” trusted God’s grace to cover me and believed it would somehow negate the ramifications of those little sins that didn’t seem that big of a deal. (Though my life proved differently, which I refused to acknowledge.) Subconsciously, I assumed “I’m forgiven, this hardship can’t be happening because of those little insignificant sins” so I never learned. More than any other, we are best at deceiving ourselves. Further, for conscious sake, we often don’t call those little sins what they are, but they are covered in excuses, justifications, rationalizations … basically self-deception.

How many of us trust God’s grace to cover the sins of:

Not seeking God as He instructs us? Amos 5:4
Not pursuing His wisdom and understanding? Proverbs 4:7
Relying on our own strength and wisdom of the world to get us what we need? Psalm 147:10, Isaiah 31:1
Not loving God with all our heart, soul and mind as we neglect to spend time with Him and deeply get to know Him one-on-one? Mark 12:30
“Loving” others in a way that is really for our acceptance by them, rather than for true love? Mark 12:31

We overlook certain transgressions in the name of grace. This thinking shows we don’t understand God’s forgiveness in Christ and our new life in Him. (Now no one is perfect, obviously. But do we willing accept sins? Do we tolerate them? Or do we fight to live in God’s truth?)

In rebellion to legalism, many warp the doctrine of grace. True, the Old Testament law was fulfilled in Christ. However, there are instructions of God, like those above, that we are to follow, thus still His “law”. Grace doesn’t mean we don’t have to listen and obey our heavenly Father. It means God forgives us, by no action of ourselves, so we are reconciled back to the Him and able to receive His truth, to walk in it, and gain a spirit that is eternally united to Him.

If we truly understand God’s forgiveness and how that allows us to dwell in His presence, that knowledge changes us. We will act on this new understanding by seeking God and learning truth. This truth refashions our minds; preparing us to dwell in oneness with God.

If we really believe something, what do we do? We act on it. Once we truly understand God’s gift of forgiveness, we embark upon a journey of drawing near to God in truth and spirit. We want to know the One who showed us an incomparable love. This is the natural response to truly believing. What would our response be to someone who shows us true love? We would cultivate a relationship with him/her; same with God.

As we grow in truth, our lives are altered by that truth. John 17:17 We are the sum of our beliefs. In time, our lives are purified by the truth of God, and then God establishes His home in our souls. With Him a part of us, we desire to walk fully in His will. We see the little sins for what they are – the top of the stairs leading to the pit. No matter how small or big, anything contrary to God is following a self-will that creates destruction, pain and hardship. But in Him, our will no longer wants to have anything to do with any sin. This is why John said that those of God are without sin – our will doesn’t desire it. 1 John 3:9

If we have the truth abiding in us, will we willingly continue to sin? No. Will we desire complete obedience to God? Yes; an obedience that comes out of knowing and loving Him. John 14:23

It isn’t legalism; it’s love. What we do doesn’t “save” us. God forgave us, so He “saved” us. Seeking and walking in truth is the outcome of our understanding of God’s forgiveness. As God’s truth begins to dwell in us, our desires change because our truth is changing. We want to obey His truths as they are life and love. They aren’t burdensome because they are love and we abound in love with God. 1 John 5:3 It’s a burden when there is no love.

To willingly sin not only shows we aren’t rightly related to God, but also we readily invite a life of destruction, pain and hardship. There are many professing believers who hae been misled about grace and excusing sin and suffering for it, but have been blinded to the cause of their hardships because of the ill-communicated doctrine of grace.

To continue to knowingly sin shows we are foolish and unwise. We reap what we sow. If we sow truth, by following God’s will, we will reap deliverance, joy and love. If we sow lies, by following our self-will, we will reap pain, hardship, and suffering. There is a way to live that prospers our soul and a way that doesn’t. There are spiritual laws and physical laws. God designed us and this world to function in a certain way. When we honor His design, we live in peace; this is the essence of true wisdom. (verses honoring the world’s wisdom that destroys.) As a child of God, these laws still apply. God will not be mocked. Thinking God’s forgiveness is an excuse to go our own way is to mock God. Not a good idea.

Embrace God’s forgiveness given in grace, which enables you to live in unity with Him, by sowing truth and His love in your life. In time, as your beliefs are purged and renewed, you will reap a prospering soul. As you diligently cultivate a relationship with God, you will experience His love; a treasure that far exceeds anything you’ve known.


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Our Core Issue Affecting All Else

 

Our Core Issue Affecting All Else

I’m discovering when you dive into the issues, fears, bad choices, and unhealthy behaviors of people, the core cause is a lack of inherent value, which comes from a feeling of rejection.

I’m beginning to think this core issue (which has many faces) is the black hole in each one of our souls, which the only remedy is oneness with God.

At birth, Our Creator, the One who matters above all, is disconnected from us because of the sin nature we are born into. In this disconnect, we experience a sense of rejection that breeds a lack of value. (Deep unchanging value comes from God. A fullness and completeness of us comes by being connected to Him.)

However, this gap between God and us isn’t our intended state. We were created to be one with God in a bond of love. But because of our corruption that comes from choosing self over Him, we are rejected. God can’t be united to that which isn’t holy, for He is holy. That self-seeking aspect of us that leads us to follow self verses God is the sin that was passed along through Adam. He chose to follow himself and do what he thought best instead of walk in unity with God. Thus, he severed the bond with God and was cast out of His presence. Because we are all connected, that corrupted state is a part of us.

To our further destruction, we spend our lives trying to fill that void with everything but God. The world, governed by the first one to reject God and go his own way (Lucifer), offers a smorgasbord of lies promising to fill that vast hole. They are empty vanities of how we can gain the value we desperately need to rid ourselves of that feeling of rejection. Relationships, sex, lust, goodness, self-righteousness, the perfect parents, children who love us, success, financial wealth, perfect bodies, power, perfect health, fame, control, and so on.

In trying to fill this void and suppress the feeling of rejection, we develop all kinds of bad habits to “protect” ourselves and gain value. We build walls, lash out to control others, manipulate emotionally, withdraw from others, and become people pleasers. We become slaves to others brokenness as we try to earn approval and acceptance. We stomp on others to make ourselves stronger. We become addicted to substances/things to subdue our feelings. We surround ourselves with people trying to fill the void, yet remain completely alone.

The only way to remedy our state is to be reconciled to the One by which that void was created, God. All those other things can’t accomplish what we desire, because they can’t. God loves us. He wants us to be reconciled back to Him as He showed us through Christ Jesus.

Only through Christ, our eternal forgiveness and reconciliation, is the pathway to God opened. However, Jesus is only the door. To find deliverance from the destruction we created and oneness, we have to journey into gate and into God’s presence. By abiding in God’s presence, (seeking His face to know Him and be one with Him), we are put on a path of healing and restoration for our souls. We experience God and His love. We understand how our ways lead to death and how His lead to life and the fulfillment and satisfaction of our souls. Through this journey, we chose God above all else.

Having spent our lives trying to obtain value from all these other sources, it takes time to develop a relationship with God that is strong enough to trust Him to let go of all these other things. Though they haven’t worked, we hold onto the hope that they do, because the world tells us they do. We have to intimately know God to the extent to be able to truly turn from all that we have held on to, thus turn from self (true repentance) and be deeply rooted to Him, nothing else.

God wants nothing to fill that void but Him because only He can. He created us to be in a bond of love with Him, therefore nothing else will suffice. Anything else is an idol, which is full of empty hope. God is offering Himself to us; we only need to embrace Him in truth and spirit.

In theory, turning from self and embracing God sounds easy. I’ve found it isn’t. The path to oneness with God is narrow and few find it, because the multitude of lies in this world that tells us the contrary. It’s a journey that has to be walked with God one-on-one. No one can do it for us. We can’t do it by listening to others talk about it or talk about God. Others can only point the way. We have to spend time with God like someone we love. Though this process we get to know Him, so we can trust Him and let go of everything we tried to use to fill that void and be united to Him. In giving up the empty hopes, what we lose is the superficial temple we built trying to find our own glory. What we gain is who we were created to be as one united to God.

Dig deep into God. What are those things that you are defining yourself by? Those things you are trying to fill that void with? Seek God to know Him as He is. In time, you will start letting all vanity to embrace the One who can fill you as you desire.


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Rewards for Foolishness

Rewards for Foolishness

God will not reward foolishness.

No good father does.

We’ve all seen the scenario of a child acting up in the store and to assuage him the parent lets him have some M&Ms from the check out stand. What does that teach the child? Act up and get rewarded! Thus, the cycle begins. Can you imagine if God did that with us?

A more knowledgeable parent or perhaps a more patient one doesn’t encourage bad behavior and neither does God. God won’t reward us for our foolishness, but for our obedience. Our foolishness hurts us and others so God won’t reinforce it. Instead, we experience the discomforts of our actions instead of reward. Yet, because of His mercy, God keeps us from the full onslaught of the consequences we’ve manifested. He allows as much discomfort as we need to get our attention for the areas He wants to address in our lives. Psalm 107:17, Psalm 119:71

The discomforts (like physical aliments, trying situations or relationships, physical hardships) are to get us to seek. When all is good, we don’t ask. It’s when things go wrong that we start looking for answers. Our discomforts are often a sign we are somehow out of line with God and His will for us.

We chose to be either rebellious children living in a world of affliction because we are not heeding His Word and instruction in our lives. Or to be children who seek to walk in accordance with God’s will because it’s a path of truth, freedom, and love. Obedience is our wills coming in line with God’s so that we start living in the fullness of abundant life He desires for us. As our wills align, we gain unity with God. We live as one with Him in truth, love and purpose. Proverbs 13

Obedience isn’t about forgiveness. We are already forgiven now and always in Christ.

Obedience isn’t about being “good”. No one is good but God. Obeying God’s commands is about walking in God’s will. The moment we focus on trying to be a good person, we act according to our expectations and assumptions about what good means. Because we think we know what good is, we cease to seek God’s will in all things. Instead, we are following our definition of good thus our will, which is limited and often different than God’s. The essence of religion is people trying to be good, according their definitions. It’s easier to follow a set of rules verses seeking and listening to know God’s will day to day, but following rules doesn’t bring abundant life – drawing near to God does. True Christianity is about being in unity with God’s will. Big difference. Obedience is about the heart. If you are in line with God’s will in your heart, the right actions will follow.

Obedience isn’t about US taking control and making things right. It’s about God working in us. For Him to work, we have to submit. For a doctor to do surgery we have to submit to his work. We can’t be running around the hospital. Once we know God’s will for us in a situation, then our focus changes from moving forward our way to His. Part of our submission comes through prayer. Our prayers start to align to His will, and that is when our prayers become powerful. John 15:7

When I have a discomfort like an affliction in my spirit or a physical aliment, I seek. I seek God’s instruction and He opens my eyes to see my error. God doesn’t want us in affliction. He rewards a seeking heart with enlightenment and truth. Usually, it’s something I’ve justified to such an extent that I don’t see it as going against God’s will. But as I seek because of the rising discomfort, the Spirit points it out so clearly that I can’t deny my error. As a child of God, I desire to walk in God’s way. So upon knowing my error, my heart is moved to walk in His truth.

Though I desire to walk in God’s will, it can be hard to obey. We do what we do for a reason; approval, fear, self-protection, or lack of trust. So God also has to deal with this aspect of our rebellion as well. He has to go the source of why we do what we do, not just the outward actions. If you don’t fix the source nothing is fixed. Thus, obedience is a process. It’s a deep work of the heart and that takes time.

Because it’s about the heart, and it’s God who changes our heart, our part is to seek God’s work in us. Our role is to be willing to submit our will to God. To lay down on the surgeons table; to take the small steps of obedience as He leads us; and to pray in line with His will. Because a changed heart isn’t easy, we will never be more dependent upon Him, His strength and mercy. We have to depend on God to carry us through. We have to depend because it’s His work, not ours.

One area for many of us is a change in heart toward another. Can we just change our heart? Have you tried? I find I can’t in my own strength, but I’m not meant to either. My duty is to come to God and desire to submit and pray. I pray before each encounter with that person. I pray for a new perspective about them. I pray for God’s love to abound in me. And above all I trust in His work in me and His grace to carry me through.

Obedience is a process – an affliction or discomfort happens, we seek to understand, the Spirit reveals our error, we submit to God’s will, we pray according to that will, God works through our issues that cause such actions, and we start walking in His will. It’s a journey, but it’s the path to life. I’ve walked through this process in enough areas in my life to know it truly does lead to a more fulfilling, freeing, and loving existence.

Don’t ignore the discomforts or explain them away or think that is just life – seek. Deeply seek and listen as you spend time in God’s Word and prayer. Let God peel back the layers of your soul to expose the truth of your heart and actions because only then can your will start to align with His. As your will aligns with God it begins a sequence of events to bring on a change that will move you out of the discomfort and into the reward. Hebrews 11:6


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Unity of LOVE – Why Jesus?

Unity of LOVE – Why Jesus?

There are many who don’t believe in Jesus but believe in a universal force, a “god”, that is love and that love is fundamental in our lives and we should be connecting with it. But as you will see if you believe in love, there is a need for Jesus Christ. For you can’t abide in true love without Him.

Our Creator is a God of love and desires to be in a bond of love with us – that is why we were created. It’s our eternal purpose that will never change. With each one of us, as we are united to Him His love expands. Love entails unity and oneness. It also requires truth and honesty because love doesn’t exist without these; otherwise the relationship is a product of the imagination.

What is Needed for a Unity of Love

Our Creator designed relationships to teach us how to relate to Him. In any relationship, there are certain characteristics that are required for there to be unity and oneness. When those characteristics are present the relationship flourishes, and all parties benefit. Fundamentally, there needs to be truth, trust, and love, and each one needs to be and live as they were created. In a relationship with God, we are to be united to Him in truth and REAL love (not our warped interpretations that are really contrary to love). Further, we have to let God be God in our relationship and all that entails. If we don’t honor or try to do His role the relationship breaks down. It’s like a man trying to be the woman in a relationship it doesn’t work. He was created a man and that is all he can be.

What is Broken

When God isn’t OUR God and we aren’t abiding in truth and love, then we are severed from Him. A lack these characteristics is a sign of a broken relationship. All of us have acted exceedingly contrary on these points; therefore all of us have been severed from God. As in a relationship between a man and woman, we have been unfaithful or “cheated” on God because we’ve not been faithful in these areas. Therefore, everyone needs reconciling.

The Way Back to Love

The only way to be reconciled is if the one “cheated” on offers forgiveness, meaning they humble themselves and lay down their hurt, pain and a part of themselves (the respect, loyalty, honor, and love they deserved) for the cheater. If that happens then reconciliation is initiated.

God initiates this act of reconciliation for us. He humbles Himself and lays down His life (perfect love as He is perfect) and forgives us so that we may be reconciled to Him. To abide in unity thus love there has to be forgiveness.

God shows us the act of reconciliation that is occurring on a spiritual level in the physical life of Jesus Christ. God came to earth taking on the human form, far different from His own, to show us that He laid down His life and forgave us of all our rebellion that we might be reconciled to Him. It is difficult for us to fully understand what this act meant – for a perfect being to lay down a life for a being far less perfect, broken, and undeserving – because when we forgive others we are very similar to them in our wretchedness. But with God it was perfection laying down His life for corruption – a MUCH bigger cost and a MUCH greater love. And with a perfect holy God forgiveness can’t be based on works (how good we act) because no one could live up to the perfection required. It has to be all Him, all grace, to achieve complete unity. The way of Jesus Christ was the only way without works and is the only way to complete unity.

Imagine, it you were the god of the ants, who you loved very much and their purpose was to abide in love with you. Imagine they went their own way doing their own thing and weren’t abiding in the bond of love, but were doing the opposite in destroying themselves and each other with their rebellion. You could kill them and start over. Or, in the ultimate act of love you could humble yourself and go to them as one of them. You could tell them and show them what you did because you love them. You could even go a bit farther by giving them part of your divine spirit to dwell within them to lead and guide them in the ways of truth and love. Now in that new awareness and oneness they would understand how they went their own way and rebelled against you, and reenter into a bond of love with you. In a similar way, this is what God did for us. Jesus Christ, God taking on human form, came to lay down His life, so that we could be reconciled back to Him in truth and love.

What is Our Part

Now, ONLY if the cheater recognizes what is happening 1. he cheated or rebelled 2. he needs forgiveness 3. he accepts that act of forgiveness of the one cheated and 4. he begins to act in a way that fosters unity can the reconciliation take place. Otherwise the separation remains. When we accept Jesus Christ, we are acknowledging that we have rebelled, reconciliation is needed, God is giving us forgiveness, we accept it, and we seek to be rightly related to Him in every way. Otherwise, we don’t understand our rebellion or that only God could reconcile us. We can’t do the reconciling because He has to lay down his life in the act of forgiveness.

If we don’t understand and accept these points there is no reconciliation. Just as if you are in a relationship and someone cheats on you and they don’t understand what they did and you don’t truly forgive – then there is no true unity and love is blocked. Further, when we reunite ourselves back to another we fully understand our error, and with all our hearts desire to be in a relationship upholding the characteristics that foster unity. And with God that means we abide in truth and love, and He is OUR God. We can’t truly have this understanding of what He did and what it meant and God not be LORD of our life. If He isn’t LORD or moving into that place in our lives, it’s similar to your spouse forgaving you for cheating, but you continue to cheat. You aren’t really reconciled.

It’s the ultimate act of love to lay down your life for someone – especially for someone who didn’t earn or deserve it. God laid it down for us though we didn’t deserve it because of His love. His act of reconciliation was so extensive and complete that every thought and act of rebellion is completely forgiven – so He keeps no record of wrongs. In other words, we are pure in His eyes. Do you know of any other relationship where someone is wiling to do that? I don’t. Because God’s love is so much greater than any other we know.

When we are reconciled back to God then we can truly experience all of Him and be united to Him in every way. Then, we can know REAL love. When you realize what God has done for us – His love overwhelms you. In this act, we didn’t do anything – He did it all. We only acknowledge what He did for us to be reconnected to Him in the relationship of true love and faithfulness – a relationship we were always meant to be in. That act is real love expressed to the fullest. And if we are truly reconciled, our lives will show it, and it has nothing to do with “religion” but a relationship.

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Marriage of the Heart

Marriage of the Heart

 

We’ve been talking about divorce and remarriage in the last two posts. But what if we are in a marriage we don’t want to be in? You may be thinking this isn’t freedom. It is bondage. What about the grace of God? What about His promises of deliverance? What about happy is He who trusts the Lord? Proverbs 16:20

There are many women and men who feel they are trapped in a marriage because it is God’s will they don’t divorce. So, they “endure”. Is this what God wants for His children?

We aren’t to divorce (except in certain situations abuse, adultery, etc as led by the Spirit), so we endure. We tolerate. We do the minimum amount. In our heart we long for a way out. We want it to end. We lose ourselves in other things; children, friendships, work, and ministries, and our spouse slips toward the bottom of the list. . . Most of us have felt feelings similar to this at some point. But, this isn’t a marriage, because true marriage is about the heart. This is a heart of divorce and not God’s will. With this mindset and heart, we are cultivating division instead of peace and love. We are our own worst enemy in wrecking havoc in our marriage. This may be a hard truth to face for those of us who have lived in this mindset. But being in this place is bondage. There is a much better way. God wants so much more for us. God wants to heal and renew our marriages. He doesn’t want us to divorce. He doesn’t want us to live in misery either. He wants us to believe and experience His power of His love at work in the marriage we have.

Marriage isn’t about a piece of paper just as divorce isn’t about that. In the eyes of God, it is about the state of our heart, a heart of love. God instituted marriage to illustrate our relationship with Him. With Him, what is most important is our heart, not our outward actions. The same is true with an earthly marriage. Ephesians 5:25. All of God’s commandments are grounded in love including marriage. 1 Timothy 1:5 He doesn’t want us to simply “endure” but abide in satisfaction. Proverbs 19:23

In marriage, like everything else, our thoughts create much of what happens because our emotional output and actions carry the truth of our thoughts. The movie Fireproof is a great example of this concept. The main character, played by Kirk Cameron, did “nice” things for his wife in a last effort to save his marriage, but his wife knew that his heart wasn’t in it. He didn’t want to do them and that is what she felt. So his actions meant little to her. But when his heart surrendered to God, then he was filled with God’s love and that love filled his actions. When it did, she noticed a difference – a change that made all the difference and saved their marriage. It isn’t just about our actions and our actions without love flowing into them from our core don’t mean much.

People feel our core, which our thoughts reflect. And ladies, men feel it too. We wonder why he can be so detached and unaware as he sits around on the couch lost in the TV or buries himself in his work or hobbies – but it’s probably to escape our negativity coming from our thoughts. Not that this is always the case, but it is a lot more often than people think. How often we hear people say; I do this and that for him and he still ignores and disrespects me! It is your heart he is responding to. Men, it’s the same with the ladies. If you are being unfaithful, disconnected, and not loving your wife in your heart, she feels is and responds. We can see the vicious cycle it creates as we feed and respond to each other’s true thoughts. We love to blame others because we’re being so “nice”. But are we really? What if our spouse could hear all our thoughts? How nice would we be? Well, that is what they feel. Though they may not know exactly what they are feeling from someone, they feel it good or bad and react. If we are pouring his coffee and cursing him in our heart – it is the cursing he feels and will react to. It all starts with our thoughts. They are often the culprit feeding our problems. 2 Corinthians 10:5

This impact of our thoughts is why counseling can be constructive and helpful to a marriage. Counseling helps us to have more understanding, which leads to compassion and a change in our thoughts. It brings to light the error of our thinking as we talk through issues. We gain new perspectives. Fundamentally, we learn from counseling to think differently and that impacts our marriage. However, what we learn from counseling is at a surface level. And though it can be helpful, there is something else that cuts through everything including our thoughts, the love of God.

When we truly come to know the love of God it changes how we think and feel about others at our core. God’s love is powerful to make a significant change in any relationship.

Unlike the movie Fireproof, for me experiencing the love of God that was beyond myself took a long time. For years, I prayed to know His love. One day God filled me with it and it changed how I felt (not fleeting emotions, but a deep unchanging care) about me, God and others. Since then it has never left but grown. It came from developing a relationship with Him by abiding daily in His Word. As I grew to know God and drew near to Him, He drew near to me and His presence including His love filled my life. It started to change how I deeply felt about others. His love is powerful beyond anything we know. It seems daily I learn more and more about its purity and perfection in our lives. Most don’t understand its power and therefore don’t trust in it, because they haven’t experienced it. It is worth the heart-felt request to ask to deeply know His love. When it takes over, it renews us in so many ways including us, our heart toward our spouse, and our marriage. It isn’t an instant process but it is a process that will blow your mind. Where there once was coldness, hardness, bitterness, resentment, pain, anger, indifference, is now love; a love that is pure and strong because it is of God.

Marriage isn’t about just staying in the same house. It is about the state of our heart. But what if our spouse is unlovable? Look at God. How He loves us. His love is powerful. It isn’t by our own strength that we love but by His. Philippians 4:13 It is His love flowing through us; the love we gain by cultivating a relationship with Him. When His love flows through us it can change everything. 1 Peter 4:8

There have been several times God has called me to love someone that was unlovable at the time. The difference in those people when they felt His love through me was incredible. They may have not realized exactly what it was they felt or what changed but they felt it because their demeanor and actions changed, and the dynamic of our relationship followed. One very important note, the only way I was able to truly love was because of God’s love in me. There are two scenarios in which I didn’t have that love of God for others. One, before I had a close relationship with God, I didn’t have true love that has power. If we aren’t closely connected to Him in truth and spirit we’ll lack the power of His love. Second, my heart got hard out of pride. When I confessed that pride and prayed with a sincere motive to truly love that person then God’s love flow toward them. James 4:3 Pride is a huge enemy of love.

Every commandment of God comes down to love. Marriage is an emotional, physical, and spiritual oneness. Some of us may be far from this now. And for many of us we are a big part of the problem because the thoughts we are holding and feeding about our marriage. We need to get our hearts right about our marriage and we do that by abiding in God’s truth and letting His Words of love wash us, through prayer, and knowing that He desires a marriage of the heart – a marriage of love. And this is very important – we must believe He is powerful enough to renew our marriage and that He wants to. It is easy to doubt God’s power in this area when we are face to face with all the issues. We can easily get too focused on what is and not focused on Him. Is a renewal too hard for God? Is God too weak? Is His love to frail? Is His mercy to small?

God wants our marriages to represent our union with Him. And our union with Him is all about love – true and powerful.

A fellow blogger, Ruth, wrote a piece sharing her heart about marriage, Learning about the Precious Concept of Marriage, I encourage you to check it out.

A resource for prayer for your marriage is Proverbs 5. These ladies have a heart for marriage especially in the area of intimacy. It is there desire to pray for you.

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Sowing & Reaping or Mercy

Sowing and Reaping

or Mercy

There is an interesting interplay between reaping what you sow and mercy in the life of a follower of Christ that I’ve been thinking about this week . . . here are some of my thoughts.

Reaping what you sow (often called karma in the secular world) is about cause and effect. Mercy counteracts reaping in not getting the negative consequences for what we sow.

In Christ Jesus, our foundation is in mercy, not karma. (One note, mercy is a part of karma, if we give mercy we receive mercy, however God gives us mercy unwarranted by our actions. So for this post I’m integrating the dynamic of mercy into the cause and effect playing field.) When we are in Christ Jesus, we are righteous in the eyes of God as all that Christ is covers us. God’s love toward His children is what it is because of Christ not because of anything we earn. We don’t and can’t earn His love and righteousness. We don’t deserve it but we have it in Christ – it isn’t about karma but mercy. God’s mercy is ours because we are His. His mercy can’t be dependent on us. We have nothing to offer. Our insufficiency is why we need it in the first place. His mercy is His never ending gift to His children that flows into every area of our lives.

Matthew 6:26 Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?

Deuteronomy 6:10-11 So it shall be, when the Lord your God brings you into the land of which He swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, to give you large and beautiful cities which you did not build, houses full of all good things, which you did not fill, hewn-out wells which you did not dig, vineyards and olive trees which you did not plant–when you have eaten and are full–

However on another level as God’s children we live with Him in truth or against Him. We seek His face and draw near or not, and our choice will have a tremendous impact in our lives. It is the difference between thriving in the Kingdom of God and wallowing in a mud hole at the Kingdom’s gate. And it is this area that we play a part in reaping what we sow. If we don’t nurture and take time to foster a relationship with God then our lives will reflect that. We will lack depth in experiencing His mercy, love, provision, protection, comfort, joy, peace, and power because we are trusting someone other than Him – because we are following our will not His. Psalm 40:4 When we walk outside His will, then we will suffer the consequences even though we still experience much of His mercy.

We reap in mercy. The way we reap what is truly good is by cultivating a relationship with God that is covered in mercy and not by trying to simply be good.

Our sowing should be focused on cultivating a relationship with God because that is the source of everything in our lives. Generally when we hear about having good karma in the world’s definition of it, it means actively choosing to act good so that goodness will come back to us. In my opinion, the focus of the idea of karma is off in that it focuses on being good to get goodness. No one is good but God. The only goodness comes from Him. When we focus on cultivating a relationship with God, the result is the fruit of His goodness in our lives. Life and all that is truly good comes from being surrendered to God’s will. And surrendering to His will occurs as we seek His face with all our heart, soul and mind. There are many opinions about what good is and isn’t and only true good comes from God. Therefore only by being deeply connected to God can we experience it in our lives. All other “goodness” is a copycat that leads us down the wrong path.

To try on our own to live a good life outside of God only creates death. Often society labels things good that aren’t, and the lies destroy many people’s lives. Only in God is there life; for He is life. When we sow a relationship with Him and nourish our spirit born of Him, then our lives start to become consumed with His presence – all that is good and of abundant life. In Him, God leads us to live according to His will. If we follow His lead and heed His instruction, then we will reap the fruit of it, but it is Him in us, not us.

Living as a follower of Christ is about cultivating a relationship with God so that we live according to His love moving through us. Every command of God comes down to love – true love. When we are abiding in Him, we want to do His will because we love Him, not because we “should” do this or that. Our part is to trust God’s power working in and through us. And that trust comes from stirring the deep or cultivating a deep and real relationship with God. He doesn’t ask us to be super Christians, but to excel at depending on Him and His mercy. We are nothing apart from Him. We will never obtain His promises of abundant life if we are trying to gain them in our strength by simply being good. That is a lie that has lead many astray. Striving results in a lack of fulfillment of His promises because we are trusting in our strength instead of His loving kindness and work in us. Ephesians 2:10 Our part of sowing well is to take time to develop a relationship with Him and He does the rest through us and what we reap we reap in mercy.

Hosea 10:12 Sow for yourselves righteousness (life in Christ); Reap in mercy; Break up your fallow ground, For it is time to seek the Lord, Till He comes and rains righteousness on you.

Galatians 2:21 I do not set aside the grace of God; for if righteousness comes through the law, then Christ died in vain.”

Philippians 1:11 being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

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Stir the Deep with Me: Lesson 6

Stir the Deep with Me: Lesson 6
What to Expect?

Other Related Videos
Introduction to Mentoring Program
Lesson 1: The Process of Quiet Time
Lesson 2: Coming as a Bride
Lesson 3: Holy Spirit as The Teacher
Lesson 4: Structure of the Word of God
Lesson 5: Perspectives for Being in the Word of God
Lesson 7: Review and Mentoring Others

In these videos I discuss what to expect from spending this time each day cultivating a relationship with God.

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The Ultimate Beauty Secret

The Ultimate Beauty Secret

 

Here is what the Spirit has been teaching me this week. And this one is for the MEN as well!

People hold different images of what beauty is and true beauty comes in many varieties. In my opinion, true beauty isn’t just about outward appearances. The outward appearance can be very deceiving about the true self. True beauty moves from inside to out. The inside and outside are connected. A huge mistake in this society’s wisdom is that it too often tries to separate the two and deal just with the outside (medications, diets, surgeries etc). If you want outward changes focus inward because when we attend to the inside then the outside will follow.

True love is the defining element of true beauty; love of God, others and yourself. Yes yourself, because you can’t truly know the love of God and not have a love for the creation He made and loves, you. I realize this can be a slippery slope – this love of self – because it can be be a negative false love in terms of narcissistic, self-absorbed and so on. But when the love of self comes from the love of God it is as it should be.

What is the ultimate beauty secret? Love. And how do we gain this true love of God? Stir the Deep, the one thing that changes everything else. I know I say this is the answer to everything, but I have found in my life that to be the case. When I read Matthew 6:33 – I decided to live it. And found it to be true. As we draw close to God in truth and abide in His Word as a bride (what I call stirring the deep), our spirits born of Him grow and strengthen in us. As a result we become more united to Him, and His love, truth and wisdom fill our beings – our thoughts, actions and lives. Many “issues” that we have, which resulted in broken down bodies and a lack of care for ourselves, are resolved as we draw near to Him in truth. It isn’t an instant process by any means. But it is the only path to true life.

When our spirits are NOT rightly connected to God– then this is what we see:

Destructive stress, bottled up resentment and bitterness, festering anger, jealousy, emotional pain, lack of self-worth, envy, unforgiveness, endless worry, and the list goes on. These things eat away at our lives destroying them. They wreck havoc in our spirits thus our bodies. All these affect us starting inward moving outward. For them we eat too much or not enough. We live with stress, lack of balance, harmful addictions and habits, and self-loathing. We don’t take care of ourselves. We treat ourselves worse than we treat our cars. We make poor decisions, which leads to more problems. What’s happening in our physical bodies is often a result of what’s happing inward. Our spiritual health affects our physical health and treatment of ourselves.

When our spirits are rightly connected to God and anchored in His love this is what we see:

As we learn the truth about us, God and others, the jealousy and envy flee and instead we enjoy uniqueness, freedom, and joy in which we flourish. We experience the love of God which gives us a love for God, others and ourselves, which affects how we attend to each one of these. As we understand our value as His cherished creation and child, we start to take care of ourselves and treat ourselves with respect, which spreads to others. From the wisdom gained, we make good decisions in all areas of our lives and the self-destructive behaviors and habits dissipate. As our relationship with God grows, our trust in Him expands and the stress and worry wane and balance, rest, peace, courage, and power increase. As we experience His mercy, forgiveness floods our hearts and resentment, anger and bitterness flee.

We start to live as the new creation that we are in Him – and that changes everything.

Our lives are governed by our spirit – our thoughts, words, actions, reactions. When our spirits are rightly connected to God, then we live as we were created and God created us very good. Everything is affected by our relationship with God. If you are wanting to make outward changes in your life – start inward with your relationship with Him – because then your efforts won’t be in vain. What we need is a daily diet of God’s Word.

Proverbs 4:22 For they (God’s Words) are life unto those that find them, and health to all their flesh.

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Purging Pride

Purging Pride

 

Once again I’m laying out my brokeness before you. I hope that in showing you what I have learned it will encourage you to seek the truth of your actions and reactions that we may see ourselves as we are and grow in the grace and love of God. So here we go as the blinders come off . . .

This past week it has come to my attention – thanks to the Spirit – that when I get deeply hurt by someone pride becomes my best friend. She comforts me telling me how wrong they were, justifies my frustration, builds walls for protection from further hurt, gives counsel on how I should respond (all very justifiable), produces a copy-cat forgiveness, reassures me the issue is about them – not me, and keeps the situation focused on me ~ of course.

As I reflected back, I realized pride has been a faithful friend for years, but I didn’t see her true colors until this past week in this area of my life. I was surprised because she was so faithful that I never recognized her when she came around. I suppose I thought she was someone else.

The Spirit brought to mind a couple of different situations where she was controlling and needed to be taken out:

In one, pride reinforced her walls so that even though the pain was from the past, it was affecting the present. I held back and kept a safe distance emotionally for protection – when I didn’t need protection. But pride kept the memories fresh and the walls standing.

In the other, pride was giving all kinds of self-focused advice about how to respond to a friend’s judgments, condemnation and jealousy. And with pride’s thoughts filling my mind, my attitude and responses toward my friend lacked true love.

As the Spirit pulled off the deceptive veil of pride, this is what I learned.

As an example, here’s the second situation. My pride was trying to get me to abandon the friendship or at least have minimal contact with her because of how she was acting toward me. But the Spirit gave me different counsel – to stay in her life and love her. This is what He said . . . I need to not provoke my friend with areas where there is jealousy (He showed me what I did and how it affected her, because I didn’t realize what my actions and words were creating). I need to be sensitive to her struggles. I need to encourage and lift her up because she is so beaten down by others. I need to put my expectations about how I think the relationship should be aside. She needs the love of God to flow into her life, and the Spirit wants to use me to do that. Yes, I need boundaries, but I need to let the walls crumble that prohibited God’s love from flowing into her life through me. Boundaries allow the love to flow, and creates a healthy balance in a relationship. Walls block love. As someone commented on my last blog, if a friend stole money out of your wallet you wouldn’t leave your wallet laying around, but you don’t cut your friend out of your life either. Glup. Pride didn’t like that as I felt her power deflate.

As the Spirit guided me to what I needed to do, He filled me with the love and desire to want to do it. So “need to” became “desire to’. Incredible. Some of the hurt still remains, but the pride is fleeting. I have a feeling as I obey the Spirit’s lead in this situation, He will heal the hurt.

I can’t believe how selfish I was . . . well I guess I can because I’ve seen it before. It’s hard to see your flesh so clearly at times, but it’s the only way to fully turn from its ways to God’s. What never ceases to amaze me is as this raw reality of my actions was exposed, the Spirit gently encouraged me along. The Spirit doesn’t condemn us; He leads us to truth in love.

One of the many problems with pride is that all she creates within my thinking prohibits the flow of love, which is counter to God’s will for us. So the spirit is working on purging my hurt of pride and changing how I view these type of situations.

I’ve learned a very important lesson – when I get deeply hurt by someone, pride steps in posing as my best friend and governs my thoughts and actions. As a result love flees. I’m thankful for this awareness. I’m glad I finally saw pride, who comes in so many disguises, for who she is in this area of my life. I’m thankful for my eyes being opened to the state of my soul because only then can we truly be set free. The Spirit is a tremendous counselor if we will learn to listen and heed His instruction.

Pride and true love can’t co-exist.

1 Corinthians 13:4-6 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth

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Love like You’ve Never Been Hurt

Love like You’ve Never Been Hurt

 

army_men This past week I had a humbling lesson in mercy, love and letting go. I’m sharing a picture of my flesh side rearing up and God’s lesson to me about it – so prepare yourself.

Rewind several months ago. . . Sitting in my office, I heard this strange noise outside our house. I went to investigate. I discovered a rainbow of colors that created an abstract piece of art on the side of our house. I was starting to get upset. As I looked down, broken balloons marked with paint fluttered across the driveway. As my eyes widened in disbelief, I saw little toy green men resting quietly. Now I was starting to get really upset. I looked to my neighbor’s house. Their balcony was perfectly positioned for this target practice on my house. But I saw no one. I stomped over and rang the doorbell – nothing. Knocked on the door – nothing. I lingered back inside and the noise started again. Looking out the window, I saw mischievous delight on my neighbor’s son face and his friends. I ran outside – no one. What a fun little game – errgg. As I looked around the little army men were everywhere – in the planters, in the top balcony, on the driveway! Now I was really upset. I’m going to call the police, the HOA. Stop. Breathe. I needed to calm down. Get some perspective. Then the noise stopped.

Days later, I finally got a hold of my neighbor and she said they wouldn’t do it again. Wow, it amazed me how frustrated I got. I mean they are just kids. Look at the stuff I did. In hindsight, my passion came from a deeper issue in regards to respect. (Our reactions are rarely just about the moment, but filled with the past) So, I got a little carried away in my frustration. But I remained civil with my neighbor and it worked out. But for weeks after as I found those little green men here and there, I tossed them back into their yard. I know. You don’t have to exhort me. I know.

Fast forward to recent weeks. A car sat in front of our house for days and nights. Occasionally it moved but rarely. There’s a “no parking on the street” policy in our neighborhood for residents. Visitors can but not extendedly. We don’t have a lot of parking space and it was taking up the little room we had for our visitors. Plus it was an eye sore and it’s kind of a pet peeve. Anyway, after weeks – I had enough and called the HOA security. They came out right away. Moments later the owner moved his car. The security guard said something about possibly a ticket . . . thanks officer. (I know it’s ugly, but the honesty is the only way to show the powerful lesson gained.)

Then this past week as I was returning from a walk, I saw smashed eggs – several on the side of our house (same side as the rainbow art) and several on the driveway. First thought – it must be those little rascals. Immediately my blood pressure rose.

I called my neighbor. . . she said her son didn’t do it but in fact they had an egg on their driveway on Halloween. I still thought it was them. I mean who else could it be? But I let it go . . . yeah, right.

Then the next day as I was taking out the garbage, I saw two more eggs splattered on the driveway. Those weren’t there yesterday! I took a deep breath and went inside to have my quiet time with God. This is what I learned.

When I called the HOA security about the car, I didn’t even think of going over to my neighbors and asking them not to park there, which would have been the neighborly thing to do. My first response was I’ll show them and call out the big guys. I hadn’t really forgiven them of pelting my house with paint and army men. So, my ill-will emotions just stacked one on top of another. It’s much like a wife getting upset at her husband for squeezing the toothpaste from the middle instead of the end – it isn’t about the toothpaste; it’s build-up from the past. So I reacted.

I’d been harboring ill-will toward them since the rainbow-army men event. Not that it was something I thought about it, but my reaction to the car revealed my heart. However, I didn’t fully realize what I felt until the egg episode. I hadn’t forgiven. God taught me through this that mercy is letting go and giving someone a clean slate; like you are meeting them for the first time. That means you aren’t harboring any ill will – anger, resentment, bitterness. So in a sense, each new episode is disconnected from the rest – emotionally speaking. Make sense? I never thought about it quite like that before. Forgiveness isn’t getting in harm’s way again, if someone harmed you. It’s establishing boundaries when needed, but it’s giving others a clean slate so your following emotional reactions aren’t fueled by the past. So there isn’t a seed of anger hiding in your spirit ready to jump out at the next opportunity.

When we give others a clean slate, then the love of God is able to flow through us to them. If there is no love flow, then we haven’t truly forgiven from our heart. And often those who upset us are the ones that need God’s love the most. Loving others is part of our purpose as God’s family because unlike the world we love with His love which is powerful in others’ lives. Love like you’ve never been hurt. It can change others. Now, unexpectedly, I feel love for my neighbors. Incredible! The blockade has been removed and love is flowing. I want to bake cookies or give them flowers for something. It’s amazing how when God teaches us a lesson He transforms our heart in the process to carry out His will and that is the power of HIS instruction and not someone else’s.

Psalm 18:35 “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”

God has given us a completely clean slate always. We are pure, blameless and perfect in His sight and I’ve done far worse in my life than splatter paint, pelt army men or throw eggs. We need to give others what He has given us. But it isn’t us but God who cleans that slate for us giving us the ability to truly love. His love is real, powerful, and tremendous. Matthew 18:21-22

The world is about revenge, getting even, not letting someone off the hook. But that attitude is more damaging to us, than anyone else. Anger and the like eat away at our soul, verses love which replenishes and heals. Ill-will prohibits the flow of love. Whether it was my neighbors or not who threw those eggs I don’t know. But I called her and established a clean slate which from the sound of voice she appreciated the gesture. I’m thankful for this lesson. Because now in this new awareness I have some other people in my life of whom I really need to give a clean slate to, and I’m confident God will make that happen in me.

Psalm 18:25 With the merciful You will show Yourself merciful; With a blameless man You will show Yourself blameless;

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