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A Gift Often Left Unopened: the Holy Spirit

A Gift Often Left Unopened:

the Holy Spirit

Thanksgiving always begs the question, what are we thankful for? One gift our Father gives us is the Holy Spirit to teach, help, guide and counsel each one of us. John 14:15-17, 1 John 2:27

For years, I felt like God forgot me on this account. There were several reasons for this, but a couple were I really didn’t ask (Luke 11:13) and I wasn’t making an effort to listen. The Spirit is given to help us, but if we aren’t seeking and listening we’ll believe He isn’t there at all.

This gift we have been given is tremendous. If you’ve never stopped to listen to His counsel you may wonder – what is it like? Here is a quote I pulled off a fellow blogger’s site, RunHoly, from a woman and her experience of this gift;

“I know when the Lord is speaking to me because literally the air around me changes. There is a stillness that settles all my raging emotions and questions and simply bids me to be silent, listen, and consider what I hear. And then it’s almost as if it comes from the center of my being–the answer, the revelation, the instruction, and it is sealed in this definite place inside of me that I can’t describe. I only know that I must do what I’ve been prompted to do. If I resist, I can’t breathe, but when I say yes and obey, the most incredible sense of knowing and peace overtakes me, and the matter is settled once and for all.” –Michelle Mckinney Hammond

To learn to listen to the Spirit’s leading in our lives is an art especially these days with all the noise around us and in our heads. Cultivating this habit of being still and hearing the Spirit’s counsel is critical for several reasons:

The Spirit’s counsel:

• Is contrary to man’s wisdom
• Brings God’s power into our actions
• Has fruitful outcomes
• Is different from man’s wisdom

The Bible is loaded with examples of these points but here are two that I recently read. In Luke 5:5, fishermen had been casting their nets all day and catching nothing. Jesus told them to cast the nets out one more time. But what would another cast do when all the previous ones turned up empty? According to the wisdom of the world, it would be stupid to waste time and energy doing exactly what you had done before and what you proved doesn’t work, right? But at Jesus’ word, they cast their nets one more time and caught so much fish that their boat started to sink. The Spirit’s counsel is contrary to the world’s and at His counsel things happen. When He tells us to do something it’s for a reason and when we act according to His instruction, we are acting in a power beyond ourselves. We accomplish what we could never do on our own.

If the Spirit tells us to do something and we don’t or we aren’t listening, we will miss out on the blessing. What if those fishermen just ignored Him? What if they listened but said – you’re crazy there aren’t any fish I’m tired and going home? Often, when we do hear His instruction, we don’t realize it was His instruction and/or we talk ourselves out of following it because it doesn’t resonate with the wisdom we know and miss out on the blessings. God’s ways are not our ways. His thoughts are not our thoughts and that is why it’s so important to develop the art of listening to the Spirit. God wants to do so much in our lives, but many aren’t listening. And we have to listen to Him because His counsel is different from most counsel we receive. Many are praying and crying out to God, but are they listening to the instruction that will be an answer to their prayer?

Another great example is Joshua who sought and listened to God’s counsel and the accomplishments in his life showed it. The time he didn’t seek God’s counsel in Joshua 9:14 and acted on his own judgment he was defeated. But when he sought God’s counsel and obeyed it, God prospered all his efforts. It was tremendous the nations he conquered and the battles he won. But look at the crazy instructions God gave him, Jericho being a great example. Walking around a city blowing trumpets in order to conquer it? Doesn’t seem like a very effective strategy by the world’s definitions of logic. However, it brought the walls down and the Israelites took over the city. What unique counsel; not something man’s wisdom would suggest. But the oddity of God’s guidance brought glory to whom glory and praise are due – God. There was no doubt it was God’s doing. Listening to His instruction is for our good and His glory. Joshua 23:10, Judges 7:2

A main point of these two scenarios in Luke and Joshua and MANY others in the Bible where we see the uniqueness, contrary nature, power and outcomes of God’s counsel is that we should seek His counsel and not our own. We need to learn to listen to the one He gave us to counsel us, the Holy Spirit. He uses different strategies and if we aren’t listening we won’t know what they are and we’ll act in our own judgment and we will live the consequences of it.

What does it mean to be lead by the Spirit? To listen to the Spirit? To seek His counsel? It means abiding in the entire Word of God to become personally aquainted with His voice to be able to discern it in our lives. It means cultivating the habit of being still in His presence, seeking His counsel, understanding confirmation and acting on it. I’m finding this practice has MANY rewards as I’m learning to listen. When we are listening to His counsel for our lives and walking in it then we are doing His will and not our own of what we think we should do. We are walking in the spirit – literally walking according to His words.

God gave the Spirit to reside with us always to teach, counsel and guide. But if we never stop and listen, what’s the point of this incredible gift? It is like having a present that you never open and use. He has given us the Spirit for our good, to help us and lead us where we need to go, and to fill our lives with actions done in God’s power not ours.

This holiday season take time to consider this awesome gift and show true gratitude by cultivating the art of seeking and listening to His counsel. You never know what will happen – perhaps your nets will break or you’ll conquer those seemingly impossible giants. Whatever it is you’ll be acting in His power that is bound to blow your socks off.

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One Bible, So Many “Truths”

One Bible, So Many “Truths”

 

I wrote this while ago . . . but it is worth reposting with a few additions . . .

The other night, I was talking with my husband about a teaching I heard on end times, one area where there seems to be more theories than mosquitoes on a summer night in the Deep South; all fighting for life. Okay maybe not that many, but sometimes it feels like it.

Christians seem to disagree more than agree about the various aspects of our faith. What gives us our name, Christ, we agree on but outside of Him most beliefs are up for discovery; end times, hell, salvation by election, prosperity, authority, role of women, and state of church to name a few. The array of denominations and new ones popping up testify to the extent of our dissentions, but that isn’t how it should be. 1 Corinthians 3:3-7

In this life, disagreement will always be there because we are all in the process of learning but it shouldn’t divide us but unite. Dissensions can be beneficial in that they remind us not to put our trust in man’s words, doctrines or interpretations but to rely on God. The thoughts of man are futile, but God’s Word is perfect pure truth. Psalm 94:11, 12:6

But if we are all reading the same Bible how can we have so many different theories?

For several reasons, but I think one is about trust. If we depend on God to be our Teacher of His Word and not humans we move closer to truth and not farther away. There is one truth and He wants us to know it. The problem is many believers trust people instead of God. Therefore you get a multitude of philosophies and interpretations. How many are learning from God verses from highly esteemed teachers who are just passing along their limited understanding? That system gets us further and further from the truth. It’s like the game of whispering a secret from ear to ear around a circle. In the end it is quite humorous because the statement is much different than how it started. You have to go back to the source to know what was really said. Dwelling in the Source, the Word, you’ll start to see the multitude of lies out there being taught and believed by many.

Many believers aren’t sitting alone with God and diving into the Word with the Spirit as their teacher. There is often the accompaniment of a teacher, commentary or study guide. Not that anything is wrong with these at certain times, but if we rely on them to show us the truth, we aren’t relying on God and probably will be misled. It’s necessary to be with God alone on a regular basis and spend significantly more time with Him listening to His pure words without man’s interpretation than any other source to establish Him as the source of truth in our lives.

In Matthew 23:8, 10 the titles teacher and Rabbi denote authority in the area of instruction. The Rabbi held an honorable place in the synagogues and he was seen as the authority and expert in spiritual matters. When Jesus came, He took the place of the teachers who held that superiority as noted in the verse. Christ alone became The Teacher having preeminence in instruction about Him and His kingdom. He gave each one of us the Holy Spirit to teach us. 1 John 2:27 The Spirit gives us understanding of passages, applies them to our lives, prompts us to dig deeper, and takes us into the depth of God’s Words. If we trust Him to teach, ask for understanding and wait on His instruction, then He is faithful to teach us what we need to know when we need it know it. No one can teach us like He can because He knows exactly where we are at, how to build our understanding, write it on our hearts, and how to explain it so we understand. Jesus came and made everything personal including instruction. Galatians 1:11-12

In contrast, Paul tells us that God appointed teachers in the church. 1 Corinthians 12:28 However, this role doesn’t contain the authority of what Jesus spoke about in the previous verse. If so the verses would be contradictory. Teachers among the brethren are simply that, our brethren. All they say is secondary to our Teacher’s words. Growing up I had two brothers. No doubt in certain areas they were knowledgeable and I could learn from them, but they didn’t hold the authority, wisdom and overall instruction that my father did. Though they had points of enlightenment, they were young and immature like me and often lead me down the wrong path. It is the same within God’s family. For a healthy family, our Father, God, should hold the role as the utmost Teacher in each one of our lives. Both can’t hold first place. We need discernment in listening to others and that comes from spending time in the Word with the Spirit as our Teacher. It’s critical for the strength of His body, the true church, that each one of us builds our foundations on Him and not each other. 2 Timothy 4:3

The Word says that each one of us should be able to teach. 2 Timothy 2:24 That skill is a hint to how we should be spending our time. Students learn from the Master teacher not other students. From our fellow comrades, we share an insight, see another side of an issue, or get confirmation, but we have One, who is our Teacher. Learning from others and disagreement can be healthy, enriching, and a wonderful experience as long as our trust is in God for the source of truth and not man.

Without God’s Word no one can know the truth. There is one truth. The only way to gain truth is by spending time with Him alone one-on-one. I believe He designed it this way to draw us near to Him because He loves us. The one-on-one time builds trust and intimacy which lead us to fulfilling the first commandment and our ultimate eternal purpose – to abide with God in a unity of truth and love.

God isn’t limited by our educational backgrounds. He is able to teach each one of us one-on-one. He is God after all. Yet, if we don’t believe we won’t find. Our minds will be closed off and we won’t seek. We can’t get frustrated by the diversity or throw our hands up and think, how can I know? That mindset is counter to God’s will for us. We will never have the full picture but we can get continually closer. He wants us to know. He wants us to seek and to learn from Him. We have been given the Spirit to teach us and we need learn to hear His voice and to trust Him to do His job.

3 John 1:4 I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.

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Purging Pride

Purging Pride

 

Once again I’m laying out my brokeness before you. I hope that in showing you what I have learned it will encourage you to seek the truth of your actions and reactions that we may see ourselves as we are and grow in the grace and love of God. So here we go as the blinders come off . . .

This past week it has come to my attention – thanks to the Spirit – that when I get deeply hurt by someone pride becomes my best friend. She comforts me telling me how wrong they were, justifies my frustration, builds walls for protection from further hurt, gives counsel on how I should respond (all very justifiable), produces a copy-cat forgiveness, reassures me the issue is about them – not me, and keeps the situation focused on me ~ of course.

As I reflected back, I realized pride has been a faithful friend for years, but I didn’t see her true colors until this past week in this area of my life. I was surprised because she was so faithful that I never recognized her when she came around. I suppose I thought she was someone else.

The Spirit brought to mind a couple of different situations where she was controlling and needed to be taken out:

In one, pride reinforced her walls so that even though the pain was from the past, it was affecting the present. I held back and kept a safe distance emotionally for protection – when I didn’t need protection. But pride kept the memories fresh and the walls standing.

In the other, pride was giving all kinds of self-focused advice about how to respond to a friend’s judgments, condemnation and jealousy. And with pride’s thoughts filling my mind, my attitude and responses toward my friend lacked true love.

As the Spirit pulled off the deceptive veil of pride, this is what I learned.

As an example, here’s the second situation. My pride was trying to get me to abandon the friendship or at least have minimal contact with her because of how she was acting toward me. But the Spirit gave me different counsel – to stay in her life and love her. This is what He said . . . I need to not provoke my friend with areas where there is jealousy (He showed me what I did and how it affected her, because I didn’t realize what my actions and words were creating). I need to be sensitive to her struggles. I need to encourage and lift her up because she is so beaten down by others. I need to put my expectations about how I think the relationship should be aside. She needs the love of God to flow into her life, and the Spirit wants to use me to do that. Yes, I need boundaries, but I need to let the walls crumble that prohibited God’s love from flowing into her life through me. Boundaries allow the love to flow, and creates a healthy balance in a relationship. Walls block love. As someone commented on my last blog, if a friend stole money out of your wallet you wouldn’t leave your wallet laying around, but you don’t cut your friend out of your life either. Glup. Pride didn’t like that as I felt her power deflate.

As the Spirit guided me to what I needed to do, He filled me with the love and desire to want to do it. So “need to” became “desire to’. Incredible. Some of the hurt still remains, but the pride is fleeting. I have a feeling as I obey the Spirit’s lead in this situation, He will heal the hurt.

I can’t believe how selfish I was . . . well I guess I can because I’ve seen it before. It’s hard to see your flesh so clearly at times, but it’s the only way to fully turn from its ways to God’s. What never ceases to amaze me is as this raw reality of my actions was exposed, the Spirit gently encouraged me along. The Spirit doesn’t condemn us; He leads us to truth in love.

One of the many problems with pride is that all she creates within my thinking prohibits the flow of love, which is counter to God’s will for us. So the spirit is working on purging my hurt of pride and changing how I view these type of situations.

I’ve learned a very important lesson – when I get deeply hurt by someone, pride steps in posing as my best friend and governs my thoughts and actions. As a result love flees. I’m thankful for this awareness. I’m glad I finally saw pride, who comes in so many disguises, for who she is in this area of my life. I’m thankful for my eyes being opened to the state of my soul because only then can we truly be set free. The Spirit is a tremendous counselor if we will learn to listen and heed His instruction.

Pride and true love can’t co-exist.

1 Corinthians 13:4-6 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth

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Anchored in Love

Anchored in Love

 

Below is a video of an insight I wanted to share with you about love. I suppose this is love week 😉 Check out my post from Monday, A Lesson in Love from My Cats too.

All my videos can be found at http://www.youtube.com/stirringthedeep

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Lesson in Love from My Cats

Lesson in Love from My Cats

Malcolm & Sophie

The other day during my quiet time – I gained yet another insight from my cats, a lesson in love.

For over 13 years, it was me and my husband – no children, no pets. Then last October we got Malcolm and Sophie. Their addition has brought so much to our home – much more than I ever imagined. I’m surprised at the amount of love and care I feel for them. It was unexpected. I mean they are just cats.

As I was sitting there doing my quiet time with one lying on one side on my notebook and the other on the side next to my Bible, a certain characteristic of love came to mind that I hadn’t really considered before. With that insight, the Spirit took me into a deeper understanding of our purpose and why we were created.

When Malcolm and Sophie came into our home my love expanded. This is what I learned. Our love is like a land mass and as others come into our lives, and as we grow to love them the territory expands. In addition, the love dynamic between me and someone else is unique to us because we are unique. So with each new addition, our love grows in a unique way, just like no plot of land is exactly like another. It’s an incredible phenomenon that I’m finding my words don’t justify in sharing.

This expansion idea of love as well as the uniqueness of love between individuals taught me the deeper truth of our purpose. I’ve believed for several years now that we were created with the purpose to abide with God in love. It is our purpose now and for eternity. 1 Corin 13:8, 1 Corin 13:13 But what I realized is God made us to expand His expression of love. Love is only love when there are different parties involved – ones to give love and ones to receive the love. The more giving and receiving, the more love abounds. So He created us; souls with the ability to embrace His love and love Him in return that the territory of love might be vast and rich with each unique dynamic of love. And not only is the love expressed between Him and us, but us and others. Eternity will be incredible. Consider the most powerful experience of love you have had – then multiply that a hundred fold – that’s eternity with God. Why would you ever want to miss out on it?

Because each one of us has a unique love dynamic with God because we are each unique, we are infinitely valuable and one can’t replace the other. Sophie could never replace Malcolm and vice versa. This distinctive value puts a tremendous value on each one of us not only to each other, but to our Heavenly Father. This individual value is why there is so much rejoicing in heaven over one soul who enters the kingdom of God. Luke 15:3-10 We are irreplaceable. We can’t compare ourselves to others; we are all unique as our creator made us to be. Now if that doesn’t do anything for your self-esteem – nothing will.

Some believe that God created us to worship Him. Worship is a state of the heart. It is the natural response when we are rightly related to Him, including abiding in His love. Therefore it gladdens God’s heart, because it’s the fruit that we know Him and He is first in our lives. But that is only a reflection of our purpose which is to abide with Him in love. Because, I believe we were created for this purpose, it’s our part to foster a relationship of love with Him – love which consists of intimacy, knowing, trusting – for that’s why we are here. If we neglect that engagement we neglect our purpose and His will for us. John 17:23-26

Mark 12:30-31 “And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. 31 And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”

One more point about all this. There is a HUGE difference between loving others and God with our corrupted version of love and the pure love of God. Though our love won’t be as pure as God’s because of the influence of the world’s perverse idea of love, as new creations in Christ we grow more and more in the love of God. One of the many gifts of being His child is that you receive His love to know and to give. As I seek for His love to consume my life, I am finding it’s incredibly more pure and perfect than any rendition of love I previously had or gave. It often amazes me what I feel for others and how deeply I feel it – things I never had before. They aren’t fleeting emotions, but substantive land masses because they are fruit of a new heart created in His likeness.

We settle far too easily for corrupted, perverted, and destructive emotions that we call love. God is offering us a true, deep and real love that is of Him so why settle? We all want love. We all want His love whether we realize it or not. It’s a driving force in our lives. But until we seek and know the love of God as our own, we will experience a great lack in this area. God is offering us the love we deeply desire because He put that desire in us to draw us to Him and to be filled by Him. And only by being deeply connected to Him do we truly know this love to experience and to give others and are able to truly expand our territory of love including to our cats.

“I love my God, but with no love of mine for I have none to give;
I love Thee, Lord, but all that love is Thine, for by Thy life I live.
I am as nothing, and rejoice to be
emptied and lost and swallowed up in Thee” (Madame Guyon).

1 Thessalonians 3:12 “And may the Lord make you increase and abound in love to one another and to all, just as we do to you,”

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All All All Always

All All All Always

 

2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound toward you that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.

This verse is perhaps one of the most encouraging in all the New Testament when you are up against something outside your comfort zone.

As children of God, the limits of this physical world no longer apply to us, yet often in the midst of a physical trial we forget this truth. Fear starts to creep in and our minds and emotions succumb to the world’s wisdom. We become defeated by the things that in truth have no more control over us.

As a young child, in my room was a door to the attic. My mind concocted all kinds of things that filled that attic and that would creep out in the middle of the night to get me. My imagination often sent me running into my parents’ bedroom.

Our childhood monsters filled our young minds with terrifying encounters that brought sleepless hours hidden under the covers, and often made us flee into the haven of our parents’ bedrooms. In reality they didn’t exist, but our minds gave them power and we responded to them. We weren’t mature enough to realize they weren’t real.

Our minds are powerful tools. What we believe and what we give power to creates our reality. Childhood monsters were very real and we reacted to them. In the same way if we believe a circumstance, person or weakness has dominion over us we will react accordingly. We will fear, cower, give up, and run away. However, once a child of God and no longer living without God in this world, our trying situations become powerless childhood monsters. Only our unbelief of who God is and who we are in Him makes them real stealing our freedom, peace, and life.

Two beliefs are essential to overcoming our monsters and moving outside our comfort zones; God is always by our side and who is with us is mightier than anything we will ever face. There isn’t a circumstance, person, or personal weakness that can defeat us because God works through us to overcome all – if we trust Him.

Trust is the key to unlocking the power of these beliefs in our lives. We trust God when we know Him. In all our relationships in order to trust someone we have to know them. The same is true with God. When we personally know God, then we trust and the natural result is faith, trust in action. We don’t have to grunt out a faithful response, it is what we do as we draw near to Him.

Psalm 9:10 And those who know Your name will put their trust in You.

How do we know God? By the combination of His Word and Spirit working in us. He gives us His Spirit and our part is to put His Word in our minds. If we neglect our part we will be defeated. Without knowledge of Him we aren’t able to trust to the extent that is required for victorious living. God wants to be known by us. This truth was His desire throughout the Old and New Testament because knowing Him leads to everything else. He is our portion, but how can we trust in what we don’t know?

When you know that the monsters aren’t real then you move ahead out of your comfort zone following God’s lead in your life. When we know God then anything we face holds victory. Knowing takes time but it is a journey that brings freedom and peace into our lives. If we seek Him, He will reveal Himself.

We all start out as babes in God’s presence with irrational fears, anxieties and discomforts. It is normal. If we deeply knew who was by our side nothing would shake us. We have much to learn, and it is to our travesty if we stay spiritual babes when we should be maturing into adults enjoying abundant life. In maturity we know, trust and act on the truth that we have all, all, all always.

Realize the monsters aren’t real and they are only powerful because you forgot who is by your side. Take what you know of Him today and believe it and continue to learn of Him that the victory may be yours.

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Snowballing Effects of the Sinful Nature

Snowballing Effects of

the Sinful Nature

 

I posted a couple videos on Why Bad Things Happen to Good People? On YouTube, several people mentioned horrific instances and wondered why God, who is suppose to be loving, would allow such dreadful evils? Therefore, in their judgment, God must not exist; it’s simply life and chance. One person gave a video response about the father who locked up his daughter in the basement for 24 years and had several children by her. Thinking about this horrific event – this is what came to mind . . .

The majority of us tend to think our “little” sins are no big deal because compared to others’ sins we judge them less important. For example, I may say a lie here and there, but at least I’m not murdering! However, our “little” sins have ripple effects and if those sins are left unchecked, then those “little” sins snowball. They can snowball in our own lives, but it’s the passing along to other generations and those around us that we often don’t consider. What may seem like a small thing may feed a “bigger” sin in someone else. For example, in selfish indulgence I may flirt with someone married at work. What’s the big deal? The big deal is I’m telling others with my actions that is acceptable behavior. I can reinforce thoughts of infidelity in another. Then perhaps they go and have an affair with someone else causing pain and damage. My little sin could have fed that sin, see? Obviously, I wasn’t the only cause, but I could have contributed to it because I encouraged that train of thought. Now, we have no way of knowing how our actions affect others in a particular circumstance, but my point is we are all connected. We influence each others’ lives. We don’t operate in a vacuum. Our words, our actions have power. How are your behaviors, words, beliefs affecting others really? 1 Corinthians 10:24 Each person’s choice is based upon the combination of their experiences, previous choices, family, friends, culture, genetics, and situations. And much of that is influenced by others.

Horrific evils result from an accumulation of many “little” sins not dealt with in our lives, throughout generations, and in our society. Sins excused as no big deal. Sins give a foothold to evil – and when we open the door to let it in who knows what form it will take. So who is responsible? We say we never would do that terrible of an evil – but when we don’t address our own rebellion against God we are contributing to what could become a “bigger” sin.

These horrific stories should be a powerful reminder of the effects our little sins have. We are all connected. God isn’t to blame. The answer isn’t to turn away from God – it’s to draw near – the only thing that will heal this earth.

In thinking about this snowball effect, my fallen nature, and all the snowballing I’ve done, Paul’s exclamation came to mind . . .Romans 7:24 “O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” Then, Christ’s magnificence filled me. He set us free from this curse. The thoughts of His deliverance from being a slave to sin, mercy for not giving me the full effects of my sin or giving it to others, complete forgiveness and moving my sins as far as the east is from the west, the healing in me and the lives I have hurt along the way, and His new spirit in me that gives me a passion for His ways and His love overflowed my soul with gratitude. . . and it made me much more attentive to the “little” sins God shows me.

Apart from God we can’t know and give true love. This is what we are learning by all the pain and damage that is created from souls separated from God. That pain is to drive us to seek God; to open our eyes to the fact that going our way apart from Him doesn’t work. But instead many blame God – they have it backwards. We are the problem, not Him. Being separated from Him is the problem.

We all have rebelled against God Isaiah 53:6. We have all caused pain, damage, and added to the sinful state of our world. When we fully understand our sinfulness, the gift of God of giving His Son’s life as payment for our sins, for His healing, and His mercy toward us, then His love overwhelms us. 1 Peter 4:8, Psalm 57:10

Only by being born of God can we know and do what is truly loving and good. We need Him. We need to be deeply connected to Him. He is life.

We are choosing that evil we hate every day when we don’t choose God and His way. Matthew 24:12

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Foundation for Young Believers

Foundation for Young Believers

 

In previous videos, I shared my story of coming out of the church system – not the true church, body of believers, but the system, the institution. I addressed the issue often raised about “not forsaking the assembling of ourselves” and in this video I share some thoughts on another issue raised about young believers needing that “structure”.

You can subscribe to the videos at http://www.youtube.com/stirringthedeep

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Healing the Wounds Left by a Father

Healing the Wounds Left by a Father

 

Someone made a comment on my post Fear of God – Beginning of Wisdom about how though I was blessed with a wonderful earthly father, many aren’t. I was asked to address those who haven’t been so fortunate. I don’t necessary think I’m most qualified to address such an issue, but I wanted to honor the request and share with you want I have learned from my friends who have had issues with their fathers. I was thankful for the suggestion because many of my friends fall into the latter category. In fact, this past week as I was visiting my family many conversations came up about the impact of fathers. We talked about the effects of no fathers, fathers who neglected, over protected, who loved. Here are my thoughts . . .

Unfortunately, many men have done a poor job as a father. Like the rest of us they are fallen and far from perfect. But the role they have has such an impact in our lives that their actions effect us more than most. Fatherhood is a great responsibility. It’s a job that reveals a man’s greatest weaknesses and to those he is supposed to love the most. As a result of those weaknesses, some have abandoned, neglected, abused, and overly controlled their children. Among my friends those who didn’t have a good experience with their fathers instead had with a relationship of lack that left them with deep wounds, anger, pain, disoriented paths, and vast voids in their lives.

So if the experience with your father left a huge void or vaults of pain in your life, how can you draw near to a God who says He is your father? How do you know really what that truly means? How can you trust God to be your father, when your only experience of a father was none at all or crappy?

Initially how we view God is related to how we viewed our father. We carry over the framework given to us from our father to God. But this obviously isn’t where we are to stay mentally or emotionally – whether our experience was good or bad – we each need to seek God as He is and if we do He will teach us and show us who He is. He is able to give us what we never had in our earthly relationships, if we seek. John 14:21

Talking to one of my friends about her experience with her dad, she said, it’s true he left a big hole in my soul, but it provided a larger place for God to fill. Because of that lack it pushed me closer to God seeking from Him what I didn’t get from my dad. I have been blessed to know and depend on God in this way.

This is the treasure in broken relationships; God comes into the brokenness in such intimate way. Wounded souls gain a special relationship that is nourishing and rich with God because of the lack they had. They deeply connect with Him in a way they otherwise wouldn’t.

Often it’s the void, in whatever area of our lives that drives us to seek God with passion with our hearts, souls and minds. The wound, the pain, and the emptiness are powerful drivers. God uses these driving forces to turn something deeply painful into something amazingly blessed. Our fathers have a big impact in our lives, how much more our heavenly Father if we let Him in into the depths of our pain and sorrow? It’s about perspective. We can either see our past experiences as a never ending wound in our lives or we can see it as an opportunity to experience the presence of God in a very intimate and personal way. Where do you want to be? Which one are you fostering in your life?

Our earthly fathers, whether good or bad, are to point and drive us to our heavenly Father.

A mistake often made is getting caught up in looking to our earthly fathers to repair the damage they left behind. We aren’t to look to them but God. God is our eternal Father; our earthly fathers are but a vapor Psalm 39:5. We need to be careful not to put too much focus on the temporary because then we neglect the eternal. We are to seek God to complete and fill us, to heal and restore us. As for our earthly fathers we have to abandon the hold they have on us, or we will remain living out our lives in a reaction to theirs. We are called to live in the spirit in the newness of life, not the past. With God’s grace we can. Only God can truly enable us to move forward. Though, I haven’t had to do with my father, I have in other areas. Freedom comes from Him, and He is able to set us free from whatever binds our souls. As long as we look to our earthly fathers to play a part in delivering us from the pain we are looking in the wrong place and often will be greatly disappointed.

You can’t wait on them to change, to apologize, to make good for the damage they did. Because many never will due to blindness to their own lack. The truth is we are fallen. We cause others pain. We damage with our actions and our words. We all fall short. God is offering freedom from that bondage of pain caused by others. It is a process no doubt especially with our fathers, but is a journey that in the end will fill you with gratitude for the earthly father you had because of what it brought to you in your relationship with God. It may be hard to believe, but God loves you more than you know. He wants to give you what you never had if you will open yourself up to Him. He wants to go into the reservoir of that pain and abide, and turn it into rivers of love.

Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds.

Romans 8:15 For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.”

If you are God’s, you have a new Father, embrace Him.

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