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Category Archives: Relationship with God


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The Father Connection

The Father Connection

 

From personal experience and from a multitude of conversations, I see a very strong correlation between the type of relationship we have or had with our earthly father and the type of relationship we have with God . . . initially.

Unfortunately, many of our dads have given us negative ideas of what a father is: selfish, controlling, neglectful, abusive, overbearing, pushover, passive, and tyrannical. These poor images are often obstacles to overcome when we are seeking the truth of the character of God. Our dads’ traits create a framework of what a father means to us. Initially, we place that structure onto God, good or bad.

If your dad abandoned you, you believe God will leave you, if he was difficult to please, you think God is never satisfied, if he was distant, God seems inaccessible, if he gave conditional love, God will withdraw His love, if he was judgmental, God is seen as critical, and if he rejected you, you believe God will. On the other hand, if your dad gave you security, God is secure, if he protected you, God is your shelter, if he gave unreserved love, God gives unconditionally, if he was accepting, God will receive you no matter what, and if he was involved, God is too. Our challenge is to seek who God truly is and not what our particular experience of a dad dictates.

Whether we call him dad, daddy, pop, pops, poppa, father, sir or nothing because he wasn’t there, we all have dads who made a tremendous impact on how we view God. To understand that our natural inclination is to put our dad-filter onto God is the first step in learning the truth about Him. Without this self-reflection, we walk around unknowingly believing misconceptions about God. We will relate to Him not as He is but as our filter dictates. Our beliefs are everything and therefore it is important to abide in the Word to get to know Him as He is. It is essential to our lives, because God is life, to remove our old dusty filters and replace it with the pure, true reality.

John 8:32 “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.”

Understanding and acknowledging the impact that our dads have on our perception of God helps us to move closer to understanding who He is and therefore gain the relationship we were meant to have with Him. His intimate presence in our lives is His desire for us and to realize that most us have misunderstood who He is as a father is a monumental step to a fulfilling that purpose.

I have an amazing father. I am very blessed because he instilled in me trust, security, mercy, and love, which made it easier for me to believe and accept these traits in my relationship with God. However, it doesn’t require a good dad to be intimate with God. I have friends whose fathers were distant and negligent and God has filled a very special void in their lives creating an incredible bond. We didn’t choose our fathers. God chose them for us regardless of how they were to draw us to Him.

Me and My Dad

Me and My Dad

The intense hunger for an idyllic dad was placed in us by God to be ultimately for Him. Therefore, we are to seek Him to fill this role because He is the only One who can. If we continue to look to our earthly dads to fulfill it or have suppressed the desire out of continued disappointment we will never find what our souls hunger for. God created us with this yearning that we might grope for Him.

Just realizing this connection doesn’t change it but it is an essential step because it puts our hearts in a seeking mode. We have to personally dive into God’s Word and learn who He is. Our heavenly Father far surpasses any concept we have a dad and He wants to reveal this side of Himself to each one of us in a personal way. As always, our part is to seek.

Take a piece of paper divide it into two columns. Write down all the characteristics of your earthly father. On the other side write down all the characteristics you currently believe about God and be honest. Don’t write what you have heard, write what you believe. How does He respond when you do something good? How does He respond when you do something bad? What does He think about you? And so on.

Then start seeking out who God truly is in the Word. Write down the verses where He is telling you who He is as your perfect eternal Father. Try not to filter but come with an open heart to know Him as He is. If we seek, we will find.


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Space Suit: In God’s Presence

Space Suit: In God’s Presence

 

Have you ever had the feeling of being consumed by the presence of God? A while ago I got a strange but clarifying image that it is like being in a space suit. In a suit your life is preserved, protected, you see the world a little differently, and it goes wherever you do. Wearing it changes how you interact with your environment. If provides oxygen, the breath of life. If you take it off you lose life.

Before this unusual analogy, God’s presence seemed ethereal and hard to touch. But this image helped me to grasp how real it is and it established the solidarity of His presence in my life. It seemed a strange image but it worked. It helped me to see what it means to dwell in God’s presence, and what it means for our lives. In His presence we have protection, provision, love, mercy, grace, counsel, comfort, truth, favor, and life, everything we need. All He is surrounds us and fills us. When God consumes us, our role becomes one of rest. He does the work through us and our focus shifts from doing to being. We don’t push through life, but let God flow and work through us.

These verses give a peek into what it is like to dwell in His presence, in this space suit:

2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.

2 Corinthians 12:9 And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Psalm 37:3-5 Trust in the Lord, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. 4 Delight yourself also in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart. 5 Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, And He shall bring it to pass.

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Philippians 4:19 And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

Abiding in His presence is beyond amazing, wouldn’t you agree? Who wouldn’t want this life?

How do we put on this space suit and keep it on? By staying connected to the source. We stay connected by trusting and acting on our knowledge of Him, which is faith.

It all starts with what we know. We bring all that we are to our relationships. Now, a friend may not know a certain side of us, but that is just a lack of knowledge. It is the same with God. He is always there, but our experience of the various aspects of Him comes from knowing Him. This is why abiding in His Word is the foundation of experiencing His presence.

If we don’t know God, His promises and His ways then how do we know what to trust in? Without knowledge we end up trusting in our own image of Him, a false image, that is powerless, or we trust in ourselves that is just as helpless.

Abiding in the truth not only gives us knowledge but cultivates trust in that knowledge. Trust, acting on our knowledge, is how we dwell in the space suit.

How many times do we read in the Word, trust and such and such will happen? Trust manifests His presence in our lives. It makes what we learn about Him a reality. Without trust the knowledge we have would be lifeless.

We come to know and trust God like other relationships. We spend time talking, listening, learning, asking, seeking and experiencing and in the process we know and trust, trust and know. God made this dynamic to be a process that requires time and experiences that give us a deep understanding of Him, therefore His truth always coincides with mercy for His kids.

As we approach the next phase of manifesting His presence in our lives, increasing trust, it is critical to embrace this truth – ALL His paths are truth and mercy. Psalm 25:10 We are on the path of knowing and trusting we aren’t there yet. Our experience of Him isn’t dependent only on our trust, but also on His mercy. We know that we should trust, but we don’t. But as long as we are seeking Him, His mercy is more than enough to cover our lack.

Finally, to increase our trust, God brings events into our lives to test and strengthen it. God knows trusting Him is a struggle that is why He places challenges before us, to push us into deeper union with Him, otherwise we would remain at the surface of His presence instead of consumed by every part of it. If we remain as we are we miss out on experiencing all He has to give us. The purpose of these struggles is to become united to Him. 1 Peter 1:6-7

Consequently, these are the situations in which it is hardest to trust. We are experiencing the sovereign hand of God heavy upon us. Not against us though that is how it may feel, but to draw us near. Like Jacob did to become Israel, we wrestle with God through these times to become who we were created to be. These times push us into Him. We cry out to Him from the depth of our soul, ask Him to help with our unbelief and through the process we draw near to Him, our ultimate purpose. John 17:21 He expects us to doubt, struggle, and question through these times. But He wants us to keep Him by our side throughout the process. We are the caterpillar struggling to become a butterfly.

These trials are difficult to the point of breaking us, but their intensity is essential to obtain the trust we need to experience more of Him. We have to set our expectations aside of how we think things should be going, focus on abiding in His truth and trust Him that He is working everything for the purpose of being united to Him. He will give us exactly what we need to get us into a conscious awareness of that space suit, because that gives Him glory.

The secret to abiding in His presence, in the space suit, is knowing Him, so we can trust Him, then working through those tests of trust and when we do we will move deeper into His presence, the fountain of life.


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Abiding in God’s Presence

 Abiding in God’s Presence

 

I often mention that reading God’s Word, the Bible, is essential to our spirits’ lives. But what makes all the difference is how we read. Most people read the Bible like they would another book; a text book, a historical book, or a guide for good living and miss the whole point.

God tells us He is our husband, so that is how we are supposed to relate to Him. He desires not that we know about Him, but that we intimately know Him. To talk to Him like a spouse, to spend time with Him one-on-one on a regular basis, to listen to His words, and to put our focus on Him. He created the Bible to foster this intimacy with us.

For years, I read the Bible like a book. I believed they were His words, but I didn’t understand what I want to share with you today – that it is about a fostering a relationship not reading a book. Because of my lack of understanding, I couldn’t stay focused or disciplined in my reading. It would often be dry, I wouldn’t get much out of it, most of it didn’t seem to relate to me and parts were boring and confusing. So, I rarely read, read in spurts, and preferred listening to someone else talk about Him instead of going to Him. I knew I should read, but just couldn’t seem to fly solo.

After hitting yet another low point in my life, I made a commitment to read a chapter a day regardless of how I felt (that was key to getting started). After that commitment, God showed me how I was approaching it wrong in three main ways; my motive, our relationship and His role. From then on everything changed; I mean everything – my entire existence because I started to abide in His presence.

  1. My motive.  Every time I sat down to read, it had always been about me; what I got out of it, if I felt encouraged, inspired, connected to God, if He answered my questions and prayers to be healed, restored, and feel His presence.

God told me – what if you treated your husband that way? What if it was always about you? What kind of intimacy would you have? Intimacy takes two. Your motive when you come to My Word should be to learn about Me, to get to know Me. That fosters intimacy. Stop making it about you. Make it about Me and I will take care of you.

He started to reveal Himself to me in ways I had never known despite the years I spent in church and Bible studies.

  1. Our relationship. I use to approach reading the Bible like reading a book, after all it is a book, right?

God told me – You say you love Me, but you don’t spend time with me like you love Me.  I am no longer a flesh man, the flesh is gone. I am Spirit and that is how you are to know Me. 2 Corin. 5: 16 My Spirit is in the Bible like it was in the flesh man, Jesus. The word became flesh and dwelt among us. John 1:14 If Jesus, the flesh body, was here what would you do? Would you spend time with Him? Would you want to talk to Him one-on-one?  He is here.

I was no longer sitting down to read a guide for good living, I was sitting down with my God and talking with Him, listening to Him, hearing His heart, will, and desires. I was cultivating a relationship.

  1. His role. I had depended on others to teach me about God. I thought I couldn’t glean what they could from the Word, so I didn’t. I figured it wasn’t my gift. It was easier listening to others’ words, ideas, and interpretations than weeding through all those chapters by myself.  I thought it was one in the same.

God told me – What if you always went to your husband’s friends and family to learn about him? They may repeat things he said, talk about things he had done, but how well would you know him? What kind of intimacy would you have with him? This is how you are acting toward Me when you rely on others to teach you about Me. I gave you My Spirit so you can understand all I have to tell you. 1 John 2:27, Hebrews 5:12  Teachers are to teach others to teach themselves, not spoon-feed them. 2 Timothy 2:24  I want you to come directly to Me because that requires a seeking heart, trust and dependency on Me and those things foster the depth of intimacy I desire with you. I will teach you about Me, trust Me. If you continue to rely on others there is only so close we can be.

My mind being renewed in these three ways altered my time with God. My relationship with Him started to become what I always desired thus true life followed. I won’t mislead you, knowing Him takes time, years, just like it does in other relationships. It was years of spending time before I felt true intimacy with Him, where I felt I was abiding in His presence. But God gave us His Word and His Spirit so we could know Him, be one with Him in will, purpose, and desire and abide in true love and truth. If we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us.