Living Light

Stirring The Deep


6 Comments

Learning to Breathe Air

Learning to Breathe Air

 

Job 42:5-6 “I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear, But now my eye sees You. Therefore I abhor myself, And repent in dust and ashes.”

This verse describes the end of death and the beginning of life in our souls.

My deepest desire is for others, all of creation down to a snail, to feel nothing but pure love from me. It’s a beautiful desire, yet impossible for me alone to fulfill. Matthew 19:26, Romans 5:18

This past week, I came to the end of myself as I never have before. As Christ’s pure light expands in our lives, EVERYTHING is exposed. The response? A complete “face plant” before our heavenly Father, a deep true humility.

Over the years, I’ve learned and repented from how I hurt myself and others … but not to this depth. Some time ago, I felt a dying to myself. I remember the moment. It was very powerful, and a lot changed in my life after that depth of letting go. But He took me even deeper this past week.

The brightness of Christ’s coming means a great awakening to the darkness of the pit we’ve lived in, thus a falling on our face. In His mercy, He keeps us from seeing the depth of our depravity until He is ready to bring deliverance, or else the awareness would destroy us.

This time in new depths, I saw how much pain I’ve created in my life for myself and others over the years. I saw how I was a co-creator to ALL my own pain; and for the first time took responsibility for ALL the hurts in my life. I realized my propensity to unknowingly harm others and this awakening pained me deep within my heart. I became deeply aware of how cruel I could be to myself and others. Yet, God wasn’t showing me these things to discourage me, though it ripped out my heart, but to take me to another level of my desperate need of Him so He could give me more of Him. Ezekiel 36:26

In this depth of awareness, I learned a deeper meaning of self-righteousness. Self-righteousness is thinking at anytime you don’t cause harm to yourself or others, when in actuality, at any moment you can cause harm no matter how much you desire not to or how nice others say you are. We are to grow in understanding of what true love is, and this is very important as it is a part of giving pure love, but any true love that is given or received among mankind is by the grace of God working through us and not ourselves. You realize this when you realize the hurt you are capable of at any moment because of your limited understanding.

God revealed this hidden beast I was blinded to. It was always there, but as God dislodged it from my soul, I saw it and it was ugly. Whenever we see the depths of our ugliness, we can be thankful for God is showing us because He is removing it and putting truth in its place; for the only reason we see it is because of His light in us revealing the contrast.

In more deeply understanding the pain I’m capable of, in whatever degree; my hunger for His righteousness grew a hundred-fold. Romans 5  Only God can truly love. Only God is truly good. Only God is all knowing so He can be truly loving in every circumstance. Thus, we need Him to empty us of ourselves, which happens when we realize our ability to hurt another part of His creation at any moment and a strong desire not to. To be emptied we have to be willing to see the pain we cause, admit our part, and trust Him to create every present moment. The glorious news is it’s our heavenly Father’s desire to give us His pure beautiful spirit; thus to fulfill this hunger. Matthew 5:6

When we reach this point of awareness; then we are ready to receive His breath of life and He raises us up by His spirit filling us. After this “face-plant” experience, only He can cause us to stand. He wants us only to see the depths of our need so we sell all, so He can fill all. Luke 18:22 It’s in this awareness of who we are, who He is, that we joyously let Him take over and let Him fill all. Romans 5:3-5

One warning; those who have been labeled “nice” or “good” are in danger of being most blinded to the harm they cause, thus to their self-righteousness. They don’t see the hurt they cause as plainly as those who aren’t labeled good and nice. We all hurt and are hurt by others. We all need to reach this awareness, for we all unknowingly can cause harm at any moment. We all cause cruelty in our lives to ourselves, others and creation and until we recognize the fullness of our part in feeding cruelty we stay trapped in it. Once we see and acknowledge our part; we start to be emptied to be filled by the pure spirit of love.

How do you know when you’ve sold all? You cease to judge others, hold unforgivness, blame, or the like. You have a deep love for others without effort, even those who have hurt you. Romans 2:1 If you hold anything against anyone, you’ve yet to see your own depravity.

How do you come to the end of yourself? Diligently seek the purest of love.

The commandments are to love. Obeying them is possible only if God governs EVERY breath; for in a moment you can hurt instead of love. We have to trust Him to establish every present moment. We have to be “beheaded” of our mind, self, all we are, and receive Him as our new head establishing every thought in perfect wisdom and love. Revelation 20:4 We have to learn to breathe by the spirit (air) by letting all our sour wine drain out, gain new wineskins, and be filled with the breath of life.

Never stop seeking the purest of love; which you learn from the Father directly through the experiences of your life. Seek to see the truth of what you create in your life and in the lives of others. Coming into the truth is about knowing pure love. This is to be our pursuit. If you seek, you will be emptied of what you thought was good and loving, and will start to experience the filling of His Spirit into yours. Then your “works” or “good fruit” in your life will be a testimony of His presence in you.

Learning to breathe air is receiving and living by His righteousness.  It’s as a great of a transition as leaving the water of the womb and breathing the air of life; and even more so.


58 Comments

Love Letters to God

Love Letters to God 

In the last post, I recommended writing two love letters to God; one reflecting where you are today in your relationship with God and one where you would like to be.

The first commandment is:

Matthew 12:30 ‘And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment.

How many of us actually live a life that fulfills this commandment? What do you do with someone you love? Do you do the things that cultivate a relationship with God in which you can love Him with all your heart, soul and mind? Sadly most are more concerned about following the commandments of men (i.e. being in church) and those are put first, while this one is lost in the busyness.

I challenge you to put God first. Seek for Him to be your first love.  Do what it takes to Love Him with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. Spend quality time with Him each day getting to know Him through His Word; talking, listening, sharing and growing in unity. Seek to learn from and listen to His Holy Spirit given to you.  Start by writing a love letter describing your relationship today and then write one for where you want to be. Then you’ll know where you are headed and then DO what it TAKES to get there.

Here are a few exerts from the letters I wrote. How limited our words are.

Exerpt of my Love Letter of Today

My Lord,

How my heart longs for you; your presence, love and truth. You are my everything. Apart from you I’m nothing and can do nothing. You are my life.  

Time with you each day means so much. I cherish each moment we spend together. It ills me to miss it. Your words spoken to me are perfect. You always know just what to say and when to say it. My heart longs to hear your voice constantly. Let your whispers ring clear in my ears. Be ever so close to me.

Thank you for the love you’ve shown me. It’s one far purer, deeper and more real than I’ve ever known. Thank you for the strength, peace and help you give me. Your faithfulness is my hope, delight and strength. I feel protected in our embrace. The shelter of your strong countenance give me peace.

I love you Lord. I want to know you more. I want more of you to consume me as I’ve tasted your goodness.

Exerpt of my Love Letter of the Future

My Lord,

We are bound, You and I, in the soul. We do everything together in unity of will, truth and love. You are the love of my life. Your love pulsates through me and others feel that vibration. I can’t stop talking of You for you consume my thoughts and my life. Our oneness is deep, rich, powerful and passionate. Only in your strength do I breathe. I see and feel you in every step and at every turn. Your words of wisdom fill my thoughts; I can’t wait to hear what you will say next. They leave room for nothing else.

All day long I hear your sweet whispers to me. In everything I think of and consult you, for our lives are one. I’m clothed in your love. May your fountain of living waters never cease to fill me. May there never be a separation between you and I.

You are my joy, strength and life. Your love is sweeter than any I’ve known. It changes, renews and refreshes me. I feel captivated by your love. I’ve never felt more alive than I do now.

Your spirit moves in me like a gentle breeze. It never leaves; even in the stillness the power of your spirit is evident.

I long for you and yet you are always there. I hunger for more and you constantly fill me up. There is no love like your love.

I feel the fortress of your countenance surround me and in you nothing can harm me.

Our footsteps are as one. My mind never wanders from your truth. My eyes never glance at another. I’ve know the perfection of our ways, there is no one who can compare.

In you my energy is boundless, I could run forever. Yet the rest and peace that fills every breath creates a balance of perfection.

With your hand under me there isn’t anything I can’t do; no challenge I can’t conquer. Your care for me overwhelms me.

I am most blessed among all to know your love. May you be the love of my life for eternity.

There is no better time than NOW to start getting to truly know God as He is so that you can truly love Him as He is.