Preparing for God’s Calling
If you’ve been following my posts, Wilderness Tests – God’s Care, Perspective Adjustments, then you know I’ve been going through what I call wilderness tests. (Wilderness because I feel like I’m out there in the wide open with nothing to cling to but God – and yet He is everything what I’m I worried about? And tests because I feel my trust is being tested at very deep levels within me.)
God often uses my dreams to reveal the depths of my heart, and I’m getting some deep insight during this trial. My dreams cause me to face what I’m really feeling, because my rational brain knows better. They have been exposing the depth of what I really think and feel so that it can be addressed with the Truth. They can be like an interpretive drama of what is happening in my emotions.
Here is another one . . .
A friend was putting together a Bible class for children. I asked if she could use my help. She asked me to prepare some pages (on graph paper) with certain phrases written on them. The phrases were to be written in different colored markers. Some of the phrases were to be taken out of certain books. Sounds easy enough. There were other women helping out with the same task. As I started out I had all my supplies but not the markers. Once I got the markers, then all the sudden the graph paper was missing. Once I got the graph paper, then the books were missing. I couldn’t get it all together to get the task done. The other women seemed to have no problem getting it all together. They kept handing my friend completed pages, when I hadn’t written one phrase. Why was I having such a problem? I couldn’t figure it out. What’s wrong with me? Time started to run out and the children started showing up as the class was about to begin, and I hadn’t prepared anything! My friend didn’t seem too worried about it, but I felt horrible that I hadn’t made any progress with such a simple task. Then I woke up.
As I asked about this dream the next morning, I felt it was related to my calling. My passion is to help others to cultivate a relationship with God that is deep, meaningful, passionate, and real. I felt God had given me the next steps for moving forward. All the elements seemed to be in place. I felt I knew what I needed to do, but yet it seemed to go nowhere. What seemed to be an easy task ended up not really ever taking off as I expected it to. Yet, others around me seem to be carrying on their callings with no problem. This dream showed me how deep down I feel about my circumstances. The elements seem to be there but there isn’t much movement forward from my point of view. Why? What is going on? In my rational brain I know that God is in control that He is preparing me and I need to relax and trust, but deep down I was feeling a bit “concern” about the whole thing as my dream revealed.
This is what God told me about this “concern” I was having. It isn’t about you “efforting” your way through. I know your heart, willingness, and passion, I put them in you to drive and focus you in your life. BUT I’m the One to lead, guide, prepare and equip you for what I call you to do. You question your ability and sometimes your path to accomplish what seems straight forward because you don’t see the “successes”. But you are right where I want you to be. Don’t give up on your passion because it isn’t happening in the way you thought. My ways are not your ways. The preparation of the person/leader is one of the most important parts to my callings. Too often people want to jump ahead. Resist that urge and trust me that I will guide you and lead you perfectly. The vision may be planted in your heart (however fuzzy), but it’s I who determine each step. You want to be there now, but I’m taking you along the perfect path at the perfect pace. Trust me. You are my workmanship. It’s not your work but mine. I will finish what I started. Trust me. Don’t you trust that I can guide you? Prepare you? Look at your past. My grace abounds toward you. You need to let go of your expectations of how it should be working out and trust me in this area. Just keep your eyes on Me – seeking my kingdom and my righteousness. This is all I ask of you.
As I was telling a friend, she said God has me “under construction” – I thought that was well said. We want to jump ahead to the doing, because that’s what we often put our identity in, though we shouldn’t. We need to be patient as God prepares our heart, mind and spirit.
We want to be at the finish line now. But the truth of the matter is we will always be a work in progress in this life. We will always need to be dependent upon God. Therefore, we need to learn to trust and let go of our expectations of how things should be happening and trust His perfect counsel. We don’t see the big picture as He does. He moves His children along at the perfect way at the perfect pace. God spoke to me about this area of my life a week ago as I wrote in Perspective Adjustments. I got it on one level, but this truth needs to go deeper until it’s truly mine and that is a process.
Ephesians 3:20 Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Living Light 
June 18, 2010 at 7:55 pm
I had a very similar dream a few nights ago. Almost the same thing.
I kept trying to google “treasure Island” bt nothing would work, the keyboard would freeze up, the letters on the keys would come off, kids were interrupting me, I couldn’t get to the right web page. All this was happening in a new house that was enormous that we had just moved into in the dream. Then I had to leave on an errand and couldn’t find my way back to the new house even though old men were giving me directions. One of the old men was wearing a yellow shirt. Go figure.
Plus I have had many dreams about Obama.
June 19, 2010 at 4:22 pm
Hi John – Treasure Island, hey? Interesting. And Obama – what a cliff hanger – anything interesting?
June 19, 2010 at 12:42 am
Rachel, isn’t this true. We need to find that place where we are just floating along with God’s current, rather than striving to make our own river bed.
Our character is God’s main concern and His timing is best. (I’m saying this for me, not necessarily for you…).
Thanks for the post and reminder to trust in God’s timing and know that the waiting is for our own good and the benefit of all.
June 19, 2010 at 12:44 am
I forgot to tell you that I often have dreams like you described where I just can’t get it together to go where I need to go or do what I need to do. I always think these are stress type dreams that occur when I’m feeling a little out of control!
June 19, 2010 at 4:28 pm
Hi Janna – love how you said ” we are to be just floating along with God’s current, rather than striving to make our own river bed.” It is true. I feel I’m moving to that point. I feel incredibly encouraged, a letting go and trust growing inside. The truth does set us free. And character is so important. Our heart and life has be to like soft clay in our Creator’s hands so we yield to His work in and through us. When we truly trust we get “soft”. And I can see how a similar dream can be a stress dream – stress as you said comes from a need to control and holding certain expectations about how our situations should be playing out instead of trusting God. So these dreams are ultimately about trust.
June 19, 2010 at 4:37 am
A pastor once told us, Rachel, “Ability can elevate you to the top very quickly, but it will take character to stay there.” He fell 3 or 4 years later, through ignoring his own advice. He’s still in ministry, but doing it his way.
Thankyou for sharing this, I can identify with you 100%. It was 25 years ago this week when I met the Lord, so in my prayer I’ve been saying, “Come on Lord, even Abraham only had to wait 25 years!?”
Without really knowing what’s up ahead Rachel, God has something for all whom He’s removed from those institutions & systems. People are very busy in there and unable to hear the voice of the Spirit for themselves. Some will come to regret that.
Someone said, “God is not looking for my ability, only my availability.”
I’m noticing that the real power of God comes from my Being rather than my Doing. And I know that you can say the same. Bless you heaps.
June 19, 2010 at 4:32 pm
Hi Roger – you made some terrific points. And I feel that being instead of doing is a reflection of true trust – it is a mindset of abiding in Him (being) and not our efforting or doing. To have that child-like trust – where you know God is in control of everything all the time. Where are focus in abiding in Him, knowing He’ll take care of the rest. There is a lot of freedom in that kind of trust. Thanks for your encouraging words.
June 19, 2010 at 5:39 am
I relate with your struggles and “amen” your musings!
I like to feel confident as a prerequisite to readiness but it never works out that way. Somehow in God’s economy I am most ready when unraveled. That seems to be when my dependency on Him increases.
June 19, 2010 at 4:36 pm
JoDee – funny you say that about confidence. I was thinking about some the people God called – and how they lacked the confidence for what God was calling them to do. We so often want to be “ready” – but perhaps we are ready when we feel we aren’t – if that makes sense. Because then we realize our need for God in all we do. It is God’s gift to us to keep us dependent on Him for that is the best place for us to be.
June 19, 2010 at 11:14 am
Thank you Rachel for sharing this. I know it was for you personally, however, I feel those are words from the Lord for me as well. I can relate on many levels. Thank you again for your passion for Christ. Continue to seek Him, and thanks for sharing with us along the journey. JM.
June 19, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Hi John M – thanks for your comment. It is encouraging to know others share a similar experience.
June 19, 2010 at 1:28 pm
thanks, Rachel, for that, and I would just like to add a confirmation to that word from God, because He has been sharing the same thing(s) with me. Whenever I’ve wanted to start ‘pushing’ ahead to get the vision and calling which He’s placed inside of me moving faster, the Holy Spirit will put His hand on me and remind me that I’m not working for myself but for Him. Then, I sit down with Him and me and talk to them both ;o) and put myself back under authority (the ‘right(eous)’ authority, let the reader understand) even as the centurion came to Jesus and asked for Him to heal his servant but would not forbear Jesus to ‘come under his roof … but speak the word only … because he was also a man UNDER AUTHORITY’. Jesus marveled at the man’s faith with words to the effect that He had not seen such faith in all Israel. That faith, I believe, is that which moves mountains, which is what we, as believers, are desiring and I think a key to that faith is knowing and understanding whose AUTHORITY we are UNDER.
June 19, 2010 at 4:45 pm
Tom – I truly appreciate your words. Thanks for sharing about being “under authority” – it is a great point. And yes – faith is all about a personal knowing of the One we are trusting, God. As we seek Him first, our understanding, thus trust grows. Then we can act on that trust, faith.
June 19, 2010 at 2:35 pm
Don’t give up on your passion because it isn’t happening in the way you thought. My ways are not your ways.
that can be so difficult but it is all aout trust isn’t it.
good stuff. hold on!!!
June 19, 2010 at 4:46 pm
Hi Bill – thanks for your comment!
June 19, 2010 at 5:19 pm
I want to say thanks to you all for your comments. I was thinking about what an encouragement you all have been. I’m thankful for you.
Rachel
June 19, 2010 at 9:30 pm
Just having read the opening lines of your post I thought you might be interested to read my recent post… It’s nothing much, but if it be of any encouragement… http://csog.wordpress.com/2010/06/19/prepare-for-rough/
June 21, 2010 at 5:06 pm
Called Soliders – thanks for sharing. It was a good post!
June 19, 2010 at 9:45 pm
Now having read the whole of the article I see the entire series I have been writing is coincidental as well as some things I’ve been dealing with myself. God says, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” – Jeremiah 29:11
“For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.” – Philippians 2:13
All this is easy encouragement to give out, but that doesn’t mean it is as easy to take in.
I’d like to add that sometimes what you are doing in the middle of your preparing or in the middle of your going forward and getting it all together is overlooked, but it in itself is accomplishing great things for God. Not only for your personally, but for others who are involved or either looking on as well.
June 21, 2010 at 5:07 pm
Called Soliders – thanks for your encouraging words. We are always a work in progress. It isn’t about our strength or abilities – its about God’s – and that is what we have to learn to trust 🙂
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May 4, 2013 at 5:01 pm
For many years I had trouble interpeting a dream in which I was guided to a wilderness and within the wilderness were large rows of tables covered with ramadas. The tables were filled with the belongings of people who passed away. Clothes, televisions, childrens toys, and money. I would never touch the things because for me it was wrong to take or use the items of persons who passed away. A few years ago I was with a girlfriend and she was searching for grizzly accidents or something like that on the internet. She kept trying to show me a tradition in Mexico where the corpse of a church official was put on display by the church and an elaborate ceremony accompanied this tradition. Then my girlfriend finds a website that interprets dreams and she asked me if I had a dream that I wanted interpreted. So I told her the dream I mentioned above and she comes back saying the website couldn’t interpret my dream. And the spirit of the Lord came near and said I have selected you to be the one who will not touch the things of the dead, neither in your worship for me will you introduce elements of death as you have seen the churchs do. And now my ministry began to be free of elements of death. That is one of my callings since I had the dream in childhood. There is no doubt that the Lord revealed to you the meaning of the dream. The spirit is very strong with you.
May 7, 2013 at 2:28 pm
Hi Leaf, as I walk the path of seeking to be part of the divine nature of God … this separation from death is an element He has taught me; which obviously makes sense He is life. If we desire eternal life, we must be about the things, ways, and concepts of life. Therefore, we must leave all that is of death behind. I am finding that the ideas, ways and things of death are everywhere and run very deep. But as I leave them behind I experience increasing love. His ways truly are of life.
June 30, 2013 at 1:05 am
Hello Rachel, I stumbled upon one of your videos about hearing the Holy Spirit, It was a blessing and an encouragement. I went on to read some of your writings on the web site and later went to your archives section where I read this writing which, although, its old regarding your dream about being unprepared to help the friend in assembling the material to minister to children. I just wanted to let you know that although this was shared in 2010 it really was timely that I stumbled upon it as I am presently praying about how to go about fulfilling what I believe God has laid on my heart regarding ministering to children in various areas in my city. I truly believe He led me to read what you shared in this dream. Thank you and I look forward to continuing to read and view more of your blogs and videos.